was clearly distracted. Her answer hadn’t satisfied him, it was clear.
She stayed in bed, unwilling to get up and wander the castle for no reason. She’d slept poorly the last few nights, for various reasons, and she needed the rest. But as she lay there, her mind raced far too much for her to get any sleep. The question of her relationship with Niall… it was a difficult one. She couldn’t stay in his spare room forever. Was she going to move into his room, as his partner? Was she ready to make the relationship that official? Anna had made it clear that there were plenty of spare rooms up in the castle, that she could make her home in any of those chambers… but would that hurt Niall’s feelings?
It was hard to know what she wanted, in all of this chaos. So she decided to leave the question for another day. Still, it gnawed at her. There was just so much uncertainty. Time would tell, she supposed with a heavy sigh. It always did.
Chapter 50
She dozed a little, that afternoon. Not long… just long enough to feel distracted and out of sorts when she woke up later. She got out of Niall’s bed and dressed slowly, not especially sure what she was going to do. Was there any way she could help against the Kelpies? Anything she could do up at the castle? Perhaps she could help Blair in the kitchens… but the familiar sound of screaming distracted her from those thoughts thoroughly. The screams were coming from Eamon’s room, and she sighed heavily, anticipating that another tantrum was on its way. But there was something different about these screams — they weren’t sounds of anger, but of fear.
She moved to the door, sudden irrational fear gripping her — there was no way a Kelpie could have gotten into Eamon’s room, but nevertheless, that was the image that rose up in her mind. When she opened the door, she chastened herself for that silly thought — there was Eamon, fast asleep in his little bed, tossing and turning in the grips of what looked like a terrible nightmare. The room looked like a hurricane had hit it — she sighed, looking around at the wreckage. He’d hurled all his toys around, and though they were all sturdy, well-built wooden toys, she could see that he’d managed to do some damage, with many of the toys showing chipped paint where they’d struck the wall. Still, that was the least of her concerns right now. She slipped to his bedside, frowning as he screamed again, his eyes flickering under his closed lids. It seemed like a nasty dream… and she had a suspicion she knew what had caused it.
Should she wake him up? She was always worried about doing that — she’d heard it could make the nightmare worse to be jerked out of it suddenly. But she couldn’t just leave him there, tossing and turning, clearly terrified. She settled for sitting on his bedside, gently stroking the damp hair out of his face — and before too long, he began to stir, his eyes sliding open blearily as he came slowly out of his nightmare. Those eyes lifted to her, widened.
“Mam?”
She took a deep breath, taken aback by that. He was staring at her intently, clearly confused — but then he began to wake up more, and a frown began to spread across his face. He’d mistaken her for his mother, she thought dully, feeling heartbroken for the poor child. Hadn’t he said that she looked a little like her, that first day they’d met? She felt a strange pang of guilt that she couldn’t be what he needed — and she reached out to stroke his hair again, hoping to offer him some comfort.
“No, Eamon. I’m sorry. Were you having a bad dream?”
But there were tears in his eyes now — and she could see anger beginning to build up in his little body, a familiar shadow of the tantrum. No, she thought faintly. She couldn’t do this again. Not another tantrum. Not so close to the other one — not with Niall still out, dealing with the Laird or whatever it was he was doing.
“Please, Eamon. Please don’t —”
“Want my mama,” he whispered, his teeth gritted and a look of absolute powerlessness on his face. “Want her! Not you!”
“I’m so sorry, Eamon. I know you miss her —”
“You want to be her,” he snarled, glaring at her as