the right time would’ve been before he’d hit on me. And then he said he wanted to stay here. That he’d leave his wife and move to Wenniway, but how could I ever be with some guy who’d do that to his family?”
“You couldn’t, of course. What an asshole!”
“Such an asshole. I was crushed, of course. And embarrassed. I didn’t know who to talk to, so I ended up at Dmitri’s house. I told him the whole story. Unbelievably, he has never repeated it to anyone. Or if he has, no one has breathed a word of it to me, and I think I would’ve heard something. Instead he went around telling everyone that I’d dumped Jason because I’d finally realized he was too stupid for me.”
My sister’s head dropped into her palms, and when she lifted it, her face was full of sympathy. “Brooke, I am so sorry you had to go through that. I wish you had told me at the time.”
I gave a little shrug, but it was only little because I felt the full weight of the memory. “You had your own drama going on. And I just felt so stupid and awful.”
“Have you ever spoken to that guy again?”
I shook my head. “Not a once. He was gone the next day. For the longest time I kept thinking he’d come back, because what I’d felt had seemed so real and so special. But even if he had come back, I mean, I could never be with a guy who cheated on his wife and kids. I’d fallen in love with a shadow.” I drained my wineglass. “So, yeah, it’s been a while since my last boyfriend, and I’m still a little skittish. Not sure I’m ready to trust Leo, and if I’m hiding behind work, then I guess I’m hiding behind work.”
She reached over and grabbed my hand. “I’m sorry I said all that. I’m sorry I made you relive this.”
“It’s okay. Honestly, it’s kind of a relief to finally admit it to someone. And anyway, it’s been six years. I suppose it’s time to get over it. I’m still humiliated, but it is what it is.”
She frowned. “I don’t mean to invalidate your feelings, but may I suggest that you have no reason to feel humiliated? Just because he lied, that doesn’t mean you were stupid to trust him. A normal person wouldn’t do that to another person. Sociopaths do that. You were duped.”
“Definitely duped. And even though I don’t think Leo is hiding a wife and kids in some other town, I’m not sure I want to fall for some guy who’s just passing through. Even if he does stick around long enough to write a book, eventually he’s going to leave.”
She nodded slowly. “Guys can be trolls. Believe me. I’ve dated my share of horrible men, but I decided to trust Ryan when he came along. It was kind of terrifying to put my heart out there, but if you don’t take a risk once in a while, you’ll never know what might have been. Maybe a fling with Leo is just the ticket. If he’s smitten with you, who knows what could come of it?”
“I guess.” I wanted to take her advice. I wanted to fling with Leo.
“And one thing is for sure,” she added with a chuckle, “he seems like the kind of guy who could make you forget all about any shitty old boyfriends.”
I found myself smiling. “That he does.”
A few minutes later, my sister finished her wine, hugged me way too hard, then left. As I lay in bed that night, I felt lighter somehow. I’d hauled that story around with me for so long. It wasn’t something I thought about often. I’d moved on, but I carried it with me. The hurt. The disappointment. The embarrassment. But I didn’t need to feel that anymore. I felt a sense of relief. Like taking off a bra that’s too tight and kind of scratchy. Getting it off you feels so much better. This was kind of like that. Not necessarily good: just an absence of irritation.
But it was also hard not to remember those first days after finding out Jason was married. That was the kind of dark place I never wanted to go to again, and if I fell for Leo, and then he left, it would hurt. So the only way to proceed was with extreme caution. If at all.
Chapter 13
“Thanks for meeting me for lunch,” Leo