thoughts went backward and forward, arguing with each other and driving me crazy.
Saint stood on one of the nearby desks in our bullpen. “Okay, folks. Thank you all for coming to help say goodbye to this year’s three fantastic interns.” He clapped his hands in a round of applause and a slow smattering started around the room until everyone had joined in. “That’s it for this week then. See you all next week… and to Ted, Eric, and Jamie, good luck with your bar exam.”
I hung my head, determined not to watch my colleagues file by me as they left the room. It all felt like some bizarre wake for my relationship. And what had started off as an evening full of love and promise had become gossip fodder of epic proportions.
Once the last person had left the room, Saint cleared his throat. “Let’s take this to my office, dude. I can think better in there. And whiskey.”
The familiar smell of Saint’s obsession with old-English style leather furniture greeted me as soon as we walked through the door. He clicked on his Tiffany lamp and created a small bubble of soft light in the corner of his office.
Then he opened his drawer and grabbed a bottle of whiskey and a couple of tumblers. “Let’s talk.”
Shit. “As a brother, boss, or friend?” I kind of needed to know. It told me how much whiskey I needed to drink to make it bearable.
“Two of those.” He watched me like he was waiting for a reaction. When I didn’t say anything, he continued. “First, how are you doing? Are you okay?”
I stared at him for a moment. Had he not just seen that car wreck of a break-up out there? But his question seemed genuine, and this was Saint. I loved him like a brother. I didn’t have to pretend or act tough, and I had nothing to hide—he knew my whole history.
I shook my head. “No, I’m not.” Tears pricked my eyes again and I stood, moving to a gloomier area of his office. “Man, I really love your brother. I love Jamie, and I would never hurt him.”
“On purpose,” Saint added. Then he sucked in a quick breath. “Sorry. Sorry, dude. That was my brother half talking…and that part of me kind of needs to know, have you slept around at all since getting together with Jamie?”
I sighed. Surely, he knew? Surely Saint, my friend, knew I wouldn’t. “So, less the friend, more the brother for this conversation? I need more whiskey than I thought.” I held out my glass. “How could you even ask if I’ve been sleeping around on Jamie? Have you seen me go out? Hook up with anyone? Even look in anyone else’s direction? Why are you even asking such a fucking stupid question?” I slammed my whiskey back in one, and it burned all the way down my throat.
“I need to hear the words, man.” Saint sat, his forearms resting across his knees as he held his tumbler. “Then we can make a plan.”
“I didn’t. I wouldn’t.” I shook my head, as surprise at how far from one-night stands filtered through me. I’d become a one-guy guy. “I one hundred percent have not cheated on Jamie this summer—or ever.” I shrugged. There was nothing else to say. “I…I just…wouldn’t.”
Saint blew out a long breath.
“Okay.” I narrowed my eyes at him in a small glare. “Can I talk to my friend now, rather than the guy-who-just-dumped-me’s brother?” I really needed my friend.
“You know… this is exactly why there was a rule.” Saint almost seemed to be talking to himself as he stared into his whiskey glass. “This shit could have all been prevented.”
I snorted. Whether Saint liked it or not, we were all still adults.
“Okay.” He set his glass down heavily on his small coffee table. “This is what I think.”
I sat in a small chair and leaned toward him while I waited for his words of wisdom, while I waited for him to tell me how to fix everything.
“You just need to give Jamie some time. Don’t look at me like that.” He waved a hand. “It’s like this. Jamie isn’t a dumb guy. He’s smart. But he learned some stuff tonight that was probably really hard to hear. Can you imagine what a huge punch in the gut—and the ego—it must be to learn you’ve been walking around and chatting to your boyfriend’s past for the entire summer, and you had no idea?” He took