Mom and me to have this conversation. It’s also not the place for Mom and me to reevaluate our relationship. Our emotions are too raw, too fresh.
In the hallway, Nana is waiting for us. My heart drops. I don’t think I can withstand an attack from her after Mom’s harsh words from last night are still so fresh and the result of my actions, Papa lying unconscious in bed, stared me in the face just moments ago. But she hugs me and I melt into her arms.
“I’m so sorry, Nana,” I cry, sobbing against her small shoulder.
She pats my back, rubbing soothing circles between my shoulder blades. “I know, baby. I’m not here to pile guilt at your feet. I wanted to let you know that Dr. Lee came by just now. You remember his cardiologist?” I nod, thinking back to that first big spell and Dr. Lee’s direct but kind manner. “He looked over all the tests and reports from last night and this morning. He wants to do surgery on Stefano.”
I gasp, and Aunt Sofia switches her support once again, taking Nana by the arm. “Is he sure Stefano can handle that? Can you handle that?”
Nana’s sad smile is hopeful but resigned. “No, and no. But it’s his best chance. Before, he didn’t want to risk it, but now the risk-reward ratio, as he called it, has shifted. With the surgery, Stefano might have a chance, a small one. Without it, he . . .”
Her words break off as the strongest woman I’ve ever known breaks down. It’s not a crumbling, dramatic scene. Angela Russo would never. But tears slip through the soft lines of her face and she hugs Aunt Sofia tightly. I feel like an intruder on their moment of sisterly support and quietly slip away to give them some privacy.
A little bit later, Aunt Sofia plops into the chair next to me in the waiting room, handing over a steaming cup of coffee. “Your uncle, my husband, was an idiot,” Sofia whispers to me. I have no idea what she’s talking about or why she’s talking about it now as they’re preparing Papa for surgery.
“I loved him more than is healthy, but Giuseppe was one of those men who always had an angle, always a scheme . . . and more often than not ended up the sucker. I blame us for living in New York, that city . . . eh, it is what it is. But ’Seppe . . . I can’t tell you the number of times he’d come home having lost five hundred dollars here, a thousand there. That is a lot of money today, but back then it was months of wages. One time, he even lost five thousand dollars from our retirement account because of some ‘plan’ he had.”
I look over, surprised. “I didn’t know that.” Apparently, hearing about my Uncle’s poor choices is supposed to make me feel better about my own, but losing money and what I’ve done to Papa are nothing alike.
Sofia nods, chuckling. “I tore the hide off Giuseppe’s back more than once when he screwed up, and he slept on the couch more days than our children probably remember. But the reason I stayed with him . . . well, two reasons. One, Giuseppe might have been a sucker, but he was also a man who’d do whatever it took to fix things. That five thousand dollars? It took him six months of working a second job at night to replace it, but he did it. He made us right again. Second, I loved him. And love is sometimes crazy, Violet.”
My voice is small, quiet enough to keep it just between the two of us. “I would do anything to make this right because I love Papa so much. You’re right, love is crazy, and maybe what I did was ridiculous, but it was because I wanted to give him that memory. I wanted to give us that moment.”
Aunt Sofia tilts her head, looking at me with soft eyes. “That is true, Violet. But I think you’re missing the point of my story. I’m not talking about Stefano. I’m talking about your Ross.”
I protest, “I can’t do that right now. It was all for Papa, and I have to focus on him.”
She hums noncommittally and pats my hand, letting me disappear into my mind. Thoughts of Ross and the wedding try to sneak in, but I push them out, not able to handle thinking