able to avoid it now because we’re coming.”
Pushing his complicated feelings about his distant brother away, Nicholas paced away from Selina. There was a more pressing question eating at him now. His tone wavered as he voiced it. “Why wouldn’t Aurora involve me?”
“She’s cutting you out, dearest,” she said. “Normally I would scratch her pretty eyes right out of her gorgeous face for it. But she’s doing it for a very good reason, you see. She wants to protect you. And she’s willing to sacrifice herself to do it.”
“Protect me?” he repeated.
“Don’t act like you don’t know why,” Selina said with a purse of her lips. “You know.”
“The marquess matter,” he said softly.
Selina nodded. “Nicholas, she recognizes that her presence in your life could bring you to your knees. If you are seen involving yourself in her troubles, that could do the same. She’s cutting you out because…” She smiled sadly. “She loves you, Nicholas. I doubted her from the moment I met her. Protective instinct, you know, because you almost died and I couldn’t bear to think of you ever being hurt again. But she cares enough that she would bring herself pain rather than taking even a fraction of what you want away from you.”
Nicholas bent his head. His fingers clenched at his sides. “She said the same to me the last time we were—” He cut himself off. “I know she wants to protect me. She apparently thinks she knows how.”
“Is she wrong?” Selina asked. “After all, what she is doing truly is the best thing for you if your ultimate goal in life is to be Marquess of Shithouse.”
“Songstrum,” Nicholas corrected with a smile. “And I think you know that.”
“All the same to me,” Selina said with a shrug.
“Wait,” Nicholas said. “You were angry at Aurora because she didn’t protect me and now you’re thwarting her plans by coming to me when she is?”
Selina shook her head. “I was angry because I thought she didn’t deserve you. But I was wrong. She does. And you deserve to be happy, love. I hope you’ll steer your life with that goal in mind and nothing else.”
“That seems to be the advice all the wisest people in my life keep giving,” he mused.
“All the wisest people and your very silly and patently unwise sister,” Selina said with a giggle.
“No, my silly sister may be the wisest of them all. I know your road with Derrick wasn’t easy. You had to have faith in him and him in you when there wasn’t much room for it. It paid off. I envy that. Just as I envy watching Morgan soften and warm under Lizzie’s light. Or Robert tame just enough for Katherine’s delight and pleasure. All of you are beacons of what love could be.”
“You could have the same,” Selina said. “I even have a plan for you.”
He laughed. “Of course you do. Well, what is it then?”
“When I snuck out of my house today, I took Derrick’s second carriage. Now your Aurora is expecting us to pick her up in our carriage in an hour. But I’ll go home in your carriage instead and you take mine. You’ll pick up Aurora and take her to the designated meeting place. I would go home and convince Derrick that he isn’t all that angry at me for interfering.”
“I’m sure that won’t take much,” Nicholas said with a laugh.
She winked. “I know all his pressure points. He knows mine too, but I am very wicked and convincing.”
Nicholas hesitated a moment. Selina’s plan would mean he was making a choice. And the choice wasn’t the title. It was the woman. When she opened the carriage door and saw him there, there would be no going back. He couldn’t allow there to be. The future he’d counted on for over two years would fade and the one he’d wanted since he was a young man would rise up instead. Golden and so very different. With so many other challenges.
“You must choose,” Selina said, as if she understood the underlying issue as much as he did. “So what do you want to do, Nicholas? What are you going to do?”
Chapter 20
The carriage pulled up on the drive at exactly two o’clock, just as Selina had promised it would earlier in the day. Aurora forced a smile for her servants so they wouldn’t see her fear.
“I do not know when I’ll return, so please don’t worry about supper,” she said.
“Yes, my lady,” Jeanette said.
A footman stepped off