He nodded. “It will be.”
“And there’re a lot of other places you could take him in Manhattan.”
He nodded. “True.”
“So, let’s just think about that…and not about her.”
He looked out the window, his hands together on the table. The sun didn’t set until almost eight now, so the city was still bright and vibrant. “How are you liking your apartment?” He turned back to me.
I didn’t complain about my life to clients for fear of making them uncomfortable. I pretended my life was just like theirs, simple and easy, a private car pulling up for me the second my foot hit the sidewalk. But I didn’t need to do that with Deacon. “It’s a whole new place now. After a long day running around, it’s nice to step into a clean space, for that apartment to feel like home. It smells different…it feels different. And sleeping on clean sheets is nicer than I realized. Now I understand why clients like to have their sheets changed every week.”
He gave a slight nod. “I’m glad it made you happy.”
I knew I should look away, but I couldn’t. My eyes focused on his profile, and I wanted to keep staring, to spend my evening looking at that handsome face, those kissable lips, those chocolate eyes. How had Valerie been married to him without worshiping the ground he walked on? How had she shared her life with him without doing everything to make him happy? How could she have wanted someone else when he was the man in bed beside her? I would never figure it out, never understand it.
He broke the silence, having no idea what I was thinking. “I’m about to make dinner. You want to join me?”
More than anything. “I should take off. I still have a lot of stuff to do. But thank you for inviting me.” I rose out of the chair, knowing I would just go home and find something in the freezer before plopping down on the couch.
He got to his feet too, in his sweatpants and t-shirt.
“I’ll see you later.” I walked to the door.
His footsteps were behind me.
He didn’t usually walk me to the door, but he did today. I turned back around to look at him.
He towered over me, his arms bigger than both of mine put together. He smelled clean, as if he’d taken a shower when he returned from the office, and his cotton clothes smelled fresh, like laundry had just been delivered. His hair was a little messy as if he’d been fingering it, probably anxious before he spoke to Derek on the laptop.
It was one of those times I couldn’t believe he was so handsome and had no clue. I couldn’t believe he didn’t understand that Valerie still wanted him, even now, even after he moved across the country to get away from her. He had no idea that our waitress had wanted to take him home and fuck his brains out. He didn’t see the world that way, didn’t see himself that way. His brilliant mind was focused on other things.
I cleared my throat and forced myself not to be weird. “Is there anything I can do before I go?”
“Tucker’s birthday is in a few weeks.”
“You want me to pick out something for you?”
“Actually, I already have something in mind. VIP seats for the Yankees.”
That was quite the birthday gift. “I can make that happen. I can get you right behind home plate.”
“I don’t want season tickets. I’m just too busy to go.”
“No. A few of my clients have tickets, and they’re too busy to use them. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind if you used them for the night.”
He slid his hands into his pockets. “I don’t mind paying for them. Not looking for a handout.”
“I know. I’ll let you know what happens. Anything else?”
He shook his head slightly. “No.”
I held his gaze for a few more seconds, wanting to change my mind about his offer and join him in the kitchen. But I forced myself to go, forced myself to behave like his assistant…and nothing more.
Five
Deacon
I sat at my desk in my office, so lost in my paperwork that I skipped lunch. Theresa reminded me a few times but gave up after I consistently ignored her. It wasn’t because I wasn’t hungry. My desire to get this finished was simply stronger.
Then my phone rang.
It was my mother.
I hadn’t talked to her in a while. We spoke after I moved to New York, but then I got busy with my