idea actually – it would keep him busy, but he might chew his way through the sofa to get to them! Then some bloke, Nick, says he’s never done that again since trying it with his dog, who didn’t find half the treats and his room eventually smelt like mouldy food and he had to throw away his sofa.
My phone bings again. It’s someone called Marge. Derek, do you really think you should be keeping a big dog in a flat? It’s hardly a sensible arrangement. Maybe you should consider rehoming him.
Just great, that’s really helpful then. It’s not exactly good advice when it’s too late, for goodness’ sake; he’s already got the dog. I hate it on these groups when people use every opportunity to have a go at others.
But we’ve got a couple more people who would like a regular call. Mavis at number 23 would love a chat every other day. What a lovely idea. I would so enjoy talking to someone other than my budgie, Sunny. I like gardening and have always played the piano as well as singing.
Greg downstairs has put: If anyone likes the sound of the sax I’m happy to play any time when I’m not at work.
Sounds great, Greg, I send back. Anyone else fancy a jamming session – we could all do some singing and play whatever instruments you have?
Count me in; Mondays or Wednesdays are good with me, say 6 p.m.? Greg.
Okay then, I type, anyone fancying a musical session, it can be playing the saucepan or the spoons, singing or any instrument. Out on your balcony 6 p.m. Wednesday week, as it will take me a while to get some music together for us all to practise.
I’ll sing if you play. I hear you were really something at Soho.
That’s a bit disturbing. Who sent this message? I squint at the screen. It’s the woman called Anna. I wonder where she heard that from? I don’t know what to put now. Perhaps I’ll just say: Or if no balcony you are welcome to sit in the courtyard whilst socially distancing of course.
Can’t wait, Anna xx
I am going to have to keep this one at arm’s length. For the first time ever I’m actually grateful for social distancing.
Be along with my deckchair then as long as it’s not raining. Looking forward to a sing-song. Be like old times. Bertie.
As long as it’s a pleasant sound. I don’t want any loud disturbance. It will upset my Minnie. Marge.
Who is Minnie? I have no idea but I’d better reassure Marge we won’t upset Minnie whoever she is.
That’s fine – it will only last half an hour at the most so we don’t disturb anyone’s peaceful evening.
I’ll take your word for it, but any unpleasant ruckus and I’ll be complaining to the residents’ association. Marge.
This Marge sounds a right one. Shame she can’t befriend Anna and let the rest of us get on with things. Still, this is an amazing start and I actually feel busy and useful for the first time in ages.
‘Hey, Sophia?’ I wander out onto the balcony.
‘Hello?’ she calls.
She was quick responding. I wonder if she was waiting to hear from me.
‘You okay?’
‘Yes, you?’
‘Brilliant thanks; your flyers are already getting an incredible response. I’ve had loads of replies.’
‘I hadn’t seen yet. Who got back to you?’
‘Well Bertie obviously – he’s really looking forward to a regular chat and a nice old lady called Mavis.’
‘You’ll be really good at this.’
‘There’s some bloke called Derek who has a large dog called Benson who’s eating the contents of his entire flat.’
Sophia laughs. ‘It’s a shame they don’t do dog TV.’
‘Great idea. I’ll try and set up a dog channel on YouTube in my spare time.’
‘Even though you don’t have a dog?’
‘That’s only a small point. Anyway, the best thing is we’re going to set up a musical evening on Wednesdays at 6 p.m. Anyone can join in and sing or play whatever instrument they fancy.’
‘That is amazing. You’ve done a fantastic job already.’
‘It was your idea. There are a couple of slightly bizarre members of this group though.’
‘You bet there are. Who in particular?’
‘Some woman called Anna who seems slightly over keen. And a right old busybody called Marge who’s going to report us all for troublemaking if we make too much noise.’
‘Marge is all right, but yes she does have to be involved in everything. She’ll be fine as long as we can convince her somehow it was her own idea. Anna