words sink in. His expression was tortured, bereft as his dark eyebrows furrowed over his eyes and once full lips were thinned as he held his breath for my answer. How I had missed him. Those eyes that had shared secrets with me, made me laugh. And yet, they were the same ones that had haunted and rejected me. I didn't want to stay and hear his apologies. I wanted to run. Nothing he could say would erase what happened, the past, nothing. But I also knew I needed to at least hear him out or I'd always wonder. No regrets. I could always leave, and I would.
"Very well," I whispered and sat back down. I expected him to go back to his own seat, but he sat next to me instead, sliding his hand down my arm and holding my hand. The sensation awoke feelings I'd have rather forgotten. Never had I been more thankful for gloves as my hand began to sweat at his touch.
"Miss Westin, it seems I have made a mess of… well, everything." He lowered his head and shook it, berating himself. "While I was at my country estate this past week, it wasn't for the reason you were led to believe." He glanced up. His eyes held me captive, trying to convey his sincerity. "I left, Miss Westin, so that I could come back and ask for your hand in marriage."
"What?" Disbelief and confusion overwhelmed me
He took my hand within both of his, caressing my gloved fingers, and I couldn't suppress a slight shiver of delight. But it was short-lived as my fear rose and stomped out any spark of hope. If that were true, why did he say all those things? Why did he apologize? My mind whirled over the questions, more confused than ever.
"I didn't leave to get away from you. I left so I could come back and never have to leave again without you. I've always known that if you even gave me the slightest encouragement, I'd do everything in my power to win your hand. When you so bravely, er…" He paused, shooting a glance to a grinning Lord Heath and an absorbed Amelia. "When you displayed your affection for me, I knew I didn't possess the self-control to wait, so I made a rash decision to leave the next day to set all the proper affairs in order that would allow me to take a wife. You."
His eyes were passionate as he spoke, willing me to believe him. He held my hand firmly, as if he were afraid I'd run away and was doing his best to anchor me to the chair. The sensation was comforting. The fortified defenses I'd build began to crumble the slightest bit.
"But… but you… you said…" I couldn't even formulate my words. "Why didn't you tell me? All you said was that you were sorry, you never meant to…" My cheeks heated, but I was too angry to care about our audience. "To put me in that type of position and that you were wrong. You asked me to forgive you altogether and bluntly said you were leaving, with a cryptic promise to fix it!" I was all but yelling. Ripping my hand from his grasp, I stood up and paced, my fury building. Of all the insane… I continued to pace, warming up to my tirade. My heart pounded. The emotions of frustration, hurt and confusion poured out of me in a rush.
"And then, as if I wasn't confused enough, Arynna tells me that you've ruined me, don't want me, and she's going to tell the world. The next morning I discover that she more than made good on her promise. Do you even understand what I've been through? Do you even have a clue as to how I've been treated this past week?" The tears began to fall in earnest, and I wiped them furiously away from my face. "I can't even leave my house!" I shouted. My anger spent, I plopped in a very unladylike fashion onto a nearby chair. "How can people be so cruel?" I sniffed.
Cautiously Morgan walked over to me, but I refused to make eye contact. "I…" he began, fumbling for the right words, "am an idiot."
I huffed my agreement and crossed my arms, not caring that I looked childish. Part of me knew I should run into his arms and forgive him, thanking him for wanting me when I so desperately loved him, but the