“You taught me everything I know.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a light kiss on the mouth.
“My beautiful Lily,” he said, nuzzling her cleavage. “How am I going to wait five more weeks for you?”
“We’ll wait together,” she said. “I miss you as much as you miss me.”
“I love you so much.” Daniel kissed her hand. “There’s something I want you to know.”
“What?” She kissed his neck.
“I want to tell you why I was waiting for Amelia that night.”
Lily sighed. “Daniel, it doesn’t matter. In fact, I’d rather forget the little harpy even exists.”
“Please, Lily. I don’t want any secrets between us.”
His beautiful green eyes held remorse, and her heart melted. She threaded her fingers through his luscious hair. “All right. Tell me.”
Daniel inhaled sharply and let out his breath slowly. “I met Amelia about six years ago at a house party, not long after her husband had died. She came on strong, as you can imagine, and I didn’t try to resist her. We began an affair that went on and off for the next five years, until my father and Morgan died. The encounters worked for me because she wasn’t interested in a commitment, and neither was I. We never had any meaningful conversation. I couldn’t tell you what her interests are to this day. I didn’t care then and I don’t now. I’m not proud of my past.”
“It’s all right. I love you just as you are.”
“You’ll never know how much that means to me.” He sighed, closing his eyes for a moment, and then opening them again. “I bedded many women during the last decade or so, and my affair with Amelia lasted the longest of all of them. It wasn’t that I cared for her more than the others. I didn’t care for any of them, at least not in the way I care for you. But she and I seemed to run into each other a lot. I wonder now if she planned it that way.”
“Of course she did,” Lily snapped. “For a man with your experience, you don’t know two figs about women, do you?”
“I know a few things.” He smiled slyly.
“I’m not talking about that. Women like Amelia are conniving and sneaky. They’ll do anything, say anything, to get what they want. Believe me, I know. I’ve seen many of them wrap my sweet brother around their little fingers. It’s sickening.”
“You’re not like that.”
“Of course not. But there are many out there who are, and with your looks and background, you no doubt attracted them all.”
“I won’t deny it. At any rate, my affair with Amelia continued until my father and Morgan died. Suddenly, I was the duke, with no preparation at all. Frankly, Lily, I was scared to death. So I went to the continent.”
“No one blames you for running.”
“I do. I blame myself. It was cowardly and stupid. But it’s done, and I can’t undo it. I can try to make up for it though.”
“You will. I’ll help you.”
“I know. I can do anything as long as I have you.” He pressed his lips to her chin. “But I want to tell you what I did on the continent.”
“You don’t—” The distress on his face stopped her. “All right.”
“I don’t remember much about the first two months. I was drunk most of the time, and I spent my nights in an expensive Paris brothel. Not my finest hour.” He took a few deep breaths. “One day I woke up and decided to go to the Louvre. Walking around, looking at the works of the great masters, I decided I wanted more from my life. The next day I traveled to the Orient and spent three months at a Buddhist temple studying and praying. I thought about my father and Morgan, and what they would think if they could see what a mess I had made of everything. But you were right, Lily. I didn’t mourn for them. I couldn’t. I turned off my feelings for them long ago, when I was sent away from Laurel Ridge as a boy, to keep from pining for them. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get those feelings back.”
Lily kissed his cheek and rubbed his shoulders. “Have you mourned for them yet, Daniel?”
“Yes, I’ve started to, love. They both meant a great deal to me, especially Morgan. He and I were very close as lads.”
“I’ll help you if you need me.”
“I always need you. This is helping