take him on a little vacation.”
“What about he takes me?” his wife says in this version. “I deserve that.” And Kendra smiles and pours the idiot some more wine. “Of course you do, dear. Bless your heart.”
Kendra tried and tried to get Abby interested in some of the new looks that girls her age are wearing, but she said the only thing she wanted for her birthday was a phone and now all she wants is for Dollbaby to come home. “Honey,” she said, and handed her some jeans. “Just try on a few things. You need some new clothes.” Abby needed an eight in the same jeans Kendra got in a four and she had to spend the whole ride home reassuring her that most girls do have a little plump phase, that once she starts her period and starts growing breasts it will all get much better.
“Stop!” Abby screamed so loud Kendra almost wrecked the car. “I hate when you talk about all of that. I hate you,” she screamed again when they stopped in the driveway. She jumped from the car, and instead of running up on the porch where Ben was working on that stupid disappearing chamber, she went tearing off toward the cemetery and the old folks’ home where she spends way too much time.
“Why can’t you just take her shopping?” Ben asked later when he came into their room where she was trying on her new things. “Why can’t it ever just be about her? Buy something for her and for once leave yourself out. She is the kid, after all.” Oh, how insightful. He has had just enough therapy to start to notice a few things, now.
“It is about her,” she screamed. “Just because I happen to find something for myself, too, does not mean I am not a good mother. I am a good mother. I am a great goddamned mother!”
“That’s what you keep saying.”
“I am!” She kicked that big red rubber toy that Dollbaby used to leave in the middle of the room all dirty and slimy. No matter how many times she collects all those things and puts them on the back porch, Abby goes and gets them and scatters them back around all the different rooms, like it might bring Dollbaby back. “But she might come back,” Abby had said, Ben of course agreeing with her, and Kendra wanted to scream and stomp and say impossible.
Ben leaned down and picked up the toy where it had bounced against the wall and set it back on the beach towel Abby had left in the corner, under a photo she had taped to the wall. Dollbaby with angel halo and wings, the first Halloween they had her.
“Just be a good mother,” he said, and looked at her with those tired red eyes. Was he crying? Was he stoned? Did she give a damn? “Just do something just for her.”
“This party is just for her,” she said. “I am about to throw the best birthday party that any girl in her class has ever had. I can guarantee you that every mother in town will be calling me up afterward to try to get answers and copy it.”
“I rest my case,” he said, and she bit back what was the true and best thing to say to someone who said he was going to be a lawyer and then never got there.
What a loser. Kendra does not want a situation of till death do us part alimony. She might if there was more to get, which once upon a time she was led to believe there was. It would mean she wouldn’t ever be able to get a real job (fine with her) but also that she couldn’t have a live-in lover, not that she isn’t crafty enough to figure all that out and get away with it—she certainly is!—but all it would take would be for Mr. Sleight of Hand to hire the right lawyer who might hire an investigator and then that would be embarrassing.
Till death do us part alimony is a great way to stick it to someone for sure, but given she’s the one who is having an affair, it might be hard to do. And this is a topic that will divide a room full of women in a hurry. She heard one woman saying how such an agreement is a step back for women everywhere. That a smart woman should just get a chunk of something