looked disturbed, like there had been a struggle there not more than a few days ago. There was something else that was in a bush, something small, brown and square. Puzzled, he went to the bush and bent over. It was a book. He picked it up and thumbed through the pages. It was handwritten and looked to be a diary. He knew he shouldn’t look at it, but he couldn’t return it to the person if he didn’t know whose it was. He stopped at an entry that was dated three weeks ago and began to read.
Today was a bad day. I had another one. It was horrible. I threw up all over the place, and I hit the back of my head on my brother’s mouth.
It was Sasha’s! He knew he should stop reading, but couldn’t seem to bring himself to. He remembered that episode, Sasha writhing on the ground while he’d tried to hold her. He felt his lips where the back of her head had hit. He didn’t know he was bleeding at first; his mother was the one to see. By the end of the episode his face and chest were covered with his own blood and he’d cut his face on the ground. He read on:
I can’t remember what happened. I almost never do, but he was covered in blood when I came to. Oh I hate this! I’m a monster! He’s so big and I still hurt him. I feel so bad. If it wasn’t for my brother I don’t know what I would do. The people in town are right, I’m cursed, I’m a demon, and when Legon leaves the queen will take me. I’m so scared. A lady in town told me that they will make me a whore and give me to the queen’s men for their pleasure. Maybe I deserve it for being a freak. I mean look at me, I can’t make a living, I’m a burden on my family… at least when I’m gone my family can have their lives back again and…
He stopped reading. The string holding his emotions broke. Now his problems seemed not to matter. He thought back on what just crossed his mind, how selfish he’d been, how… he felt an odd flash of heat and without warning his stomach turned. He tossed the book aside and began to throw up on the grass. He felt more heat, saw blue spots, and then nothing.
Legon’s eyes opened and he felt his head pounding. He raised himself up on his hands and saw a pool of semi-dry vomit in front of him. He must have been out for a few hours.
He wondered what time it was. He got up and walked to the book and picked it up, but something was off… what was it? He took an inventory and it hit him - he didn’t have a torch, candle, or anything else to make light. The sky was still covered in clouds, so he shouldn’t be able to see the ground at his feet, but he could.
Legon swept his gaze out to where the town was. He gasped. It was there right in front of him. Just a hazy outline, but it was there. He began to feel uneasy. Maybe there was something wrong with him. He began back toward his house through the woods that were dark to all but him.
He got home in near record time. When he walked in his family was sitting at the table talking to one another. They started when he came in and his mother stood up a bit.
He walked into the now silent room and handed the book to Sasha.
“I was on top of the hill and this was in a bush. When I saw it was hand written I closed it… it’s probably a diary or something. Maybe you know whose it is?”
She took it and opened the cover. Her eyes widened a bit and then relaxed. She got up and hugged him. “Thank you. I was worried sick looking for this thing. Thank you, Legon!” She kissed his cheek and dashed up to her room.
He thought about what he was thinking earlier and a voice came unbidden into his head: You don’t deserve that, you bastard; you don’t deserve her in your life at all.
He began to walk to the stairs when Edis’s voice called him back. “Come and sit down son.” Legon turned and sat.