Lady Lilias and the Devil in Plaid - Julie Johnstone Page 0,74

freedom.”

“You need a protector, Lilias! Someone to guide you and keep you from harm. I’m that man! I’ll keep you from doing foolish things.”

“I don’t want or need that sort of protector,” she said through the tears that were now falling. Her father had given her that gift, as had her mother, even if she hadn’t wanted it at the time. All those years Lilias had longed to feel protected, and she had unknowingly learned to protect herself.

Owen advanced so quickly she did not have time to react. He grabbed her by the arms as his expression twisted in agony and fear. “He is not who you believe he is! You don’t know Nash, not really. You never did.”

“Release me, Owen,” she demanded. “You’re hurting me.”

He stared at her for a moment, as if he might not do as she asked, but he finally released her. He turned and kicked out at the side table. It toppled over, the vase upon it shattering and water spilling across the floor.

Right away, a scratch came at the door. “My lady?” the butler called. “Do you need assistance?”

Owen shook his head and raked his hands through his hair, visibly trembling. “I’m sorry,” he said, sounding frustrated. “I won’t lose control again. That was not acceptable.”

“I’m fine,” she called to the butler as she touched Owen’s arm lightly. “It’s understandable, Owen. I’ve hurt you.”

“I’ll take the hurt, if you will only but see. I am best for you. He will not even have you. I vow it. You’d not want him, either. He’d hurt you as he hurts everyone. He killed his brother.”

Her heart dropped at his continued lies. “That’s not true.”

“It is! My father told me years ago that Nash stole the girl his brother loved from him, and the brother charged him on the ice, the ice broke, and when he fell through, Nash stood there and watched him drown. My father heard the truth in Town.”

She could hardly believe how Owen was turning on Nash. “Your father heard gossip,” she said, fiercely angry. “Nash told me what happened.”

“And you think he’d tell you the truth?” Owen demanded harshly.

“Yes,” she said, “he would. I know him.”

“Do you?” he sneered. “Did you know that the day I challenged him to a race in front of you, he had told me the night before that he’d let me win. He knew he was better. He told me that to shame me, to best me just as he had his brother. And I almost died—just like his brother.”

“No!” she vehemently denied. “He would never want to hurt you. He’s denied himself to protect you!”

Nash’s words from the night they stood outside the Orcus Society rang in her head then. It’s not just that, Lilias. God, it’s not, but that’s enough. Had he been referring to Owen? She had suspected all along that Nash blamed himself for Owen’s fall, but if they’d had this conversation and Nash had said he’d let Owen win, she understood why he might blame himself. But she knew Nash. He would have never hurt Owen purposely, and the fact that Owen would try to make her think so infuriated her.

“He would never have intentionally hurt you like your mother did when she left you and your father,” she said.

“Maybe not,” he said, “but he can’t help himself. He’ll hurt you next.”

“Get out,” she said in a firm but quiet voice. She had not wanted it to be like this, but this was how it had to be.

“Don’t do this, Lilias,” Owen said, his voice suddenly pleading, his face softening. “I love you. I’m the best man for you. I have always been there for you. He left you. He left you, and he will never wed you. Then where will you be?”

“Alone,” she said. “But I’d rather be alone than wed to a man I don’t love. Goodbye, Owen.” She turned before he could say more, marched to the door, and opened it.

“When he abandons you, Lilias, I’ll be here,” Owen said, now facing her. “That’s what love is. You’ll come back and I’ll be here waiting for you. You’ll see.”

Lilias wanted to reach out and hug him for the pain his mother’s leaving him long ago had put deep inside him, but that would only give him false hope with her. Instead, she shook her head and said, “One day, when you are ready, I will be here, Owen, waiting as your friend. Nothing more. And I feel certain Nash