have formed words for admiring it.
“Suitable guests don’t find the rules a challenge at all, and if you’re of sound character, you’ve scarcely need to try to behave. You will simply enjoy the camaraderie of our drawing room evenings.”
“I assure you my character is both sound and unassailable.”
“Apart, perhaps, from a slight issue with modesty?”
Perhaps an example of the “more sting than fuzz” the solicitor had mentioned.
Odd. He found it rather bracing.
“Do you keep a jar for braggarts? Perhaps you ought to have a jar for every sin or character flaw. Gluttony. Loquaciousness. Untoward musical tendencies.”
“If you feel it would be helpful in terms of modifying any of your impulses, we’ll certainly consider implementing a system of jars. We don’t anticipate a wide variety of sin, here at The Grand Palace on the Thames. Nor, by the way, do we encourage the indiscriminate inviting of guests to one’s rooms.”
He nodded thoughtfully. “Very good, very good. I do wonder how you manage to keep your establishment so apparently civilized and comfortable, Lady Derring. It must require significant expenditure and loyal staff. Who like to be paid, I imagine. As well as a steady supply of guests. And yet it is so wondrously quiet here.”
Another slightest pause, during which she studied him as if he were a mysterious corridor and she was deciding which door she ought to open.
“It’s simple, Captain Hardy. We do not let our rooms to uncivilized people, and should our judgment prove in error, we request that they leave. They will find their belongings neatly packed and placed by the front door.”
Notably, they didn’t take up the issue of expenditure.
“St. Peter has less rigorous standards.”
“He’d do well to follow our example.”
“Why, that’s very nearly heretical, Lady Derring.”
“What a shame it would be if heresy deterred you from taking a room at The Grand Palace on the Thames, Captain Hardy. May I ask, why do you find you have need of a room here?”
“I’m in the process of purchasing a ship which will make merchant runs to China and India, and as this establishment is nearest the harbor, I feel it will be a convenient place from which to conduct my business.”
It wasn’t untrue.
“And then you’ll sail away for good?”
Her tone was interesting. It straddled something between hope and regret. With just a dash of yearning. For what? Sailing to faraway places? For him to leave?
“I shall certainly be away from English soil for great swaths of time, yes. One can only be shot at so many times, you see, before retiring begins to make sense.”
She regarded him with those eyes and he could have sworn something like grave concern flickered there. “Where is your home?”
“Due to the nature of my work, I haven’t a permanent home.” Oddly, he felt as though he were confessing a flaw to her.
She blinked. Then took a breath, as though she intended to say something, then changed her mind. “Well. Our intent is to welcome a variety of people here and to make all of them feel as though it is home. We feel it makes life more pleasurable and interesting.”
She stood and moved to a little table upon which sat a stack of cards. She was small and graceful and there was an elemental pleasure in simply watching her move.
She handed one of the cards to him.
All guests will eat dinner together at least four times per week.
All guests must gather in the drawing room after dinner for at least an hour at least four times per week. We feel it fosters a sense of friendship and the warm, familial, congenial atmosphere we strive to create here at The Grand Palace on the Thames.
All guests should be quietly respectful and courteous of other guests at all times, though spirited discourse is welcome.
Guests may entertain other guests in the drawing room.
Curfew is at 11:00 p.m. The front door will be securely locked then. You will need to wait until morning to be admitted if you miss curfew.
If the proprietresses collectively decide that a transgression or series of transgressions warrants your eviction from The Grand Palace on the Thames, you will find your belongings neatly packed and placed near the front door. You will not be refunded the balance of your rent.
“Curfew?” He was bemused.
“Is there a gaming hell that will miss your presence after eleven o’clock, Captain Hardy? We feel our guests will be more comfortable if they can be assured of who is coming and going.”
This actually made very good sense.
“No, no.