“I’m…” I hesitated, “better at saying things when I write them down. I can edit. Make sure that it says what I need it to say and I don’t…” I licked my lips, “that I can make it so it doesn’t…” This was hard but for some reason I kept going. “I had to do it so it didn’t… hurt too much.”
Some of the anger slid from his features and he muttered, “Baby.”
“Can you move away?” I asked quietly.
“No.”
“Max, please.”
He ignored me and asked, “That really happen?”
My head jerked and I asked back, “The e-mail?”
“Your brother.”
My whole body jerked and I looked away.
“Nina, look at me.” When I didn’t, his hand wrapped around my jaw and he made me look at him or he made it so he could study me which he did a long time before murmuring, “What else is behind that f**kin’ shield?”
He really didn’t want to know, if he did he’d know why I jumped to conclusions about him with Mindy with Becca and he’d know just how messed up my head was. I wanted to be gone but I didn’t want him to think I was messed up and just that was messed up.
I didn’t answer and his hand at my jaw became fingers sliding into my hair.
“I’m sorry about your brother, honey.”
I pressed my lips together, felt the tears hit my eyes and then whispered, “Me too.”
“You were close,” he stated, I nodded and when he opened his mouth to speak, I beat him to it.
“Please, don’t. Please don’t, Max. You can’t be nice to me, not about Charlie. You can’t be nice. Anyone who’s nice… when people are nice…” I stopped talking and tilted my chin down to hide my face.
His fingers were in my hair, cupped against my head and he pulled me into him so my forehead was against his chest.
“All right, Duchess, I won’t be nice.”
My hands went to his stomach and I pushed at it as the tears clogged my throat and I choked, “You’re being nice!”
“Honey –”
My fingers curled into his t-shirt and I demanded, “Stop it!”
His hand at my head twisted it so my cheek was against his chest, his other arm went around me and he pulled me to his body which was shaking. “Baby,” his voice had laughter in it, “I’m not doing anything.”
I felt my breath hitch and at the sound his arm got tight and his fingers flexed against my scalp.
“I miss him,” I whispered and I didn’t know why, I didn’t even think the words before they came out of my mouth.
“I can tell.”
I pulled in a shaky breath then another one and the third went in smooth so I told him, “You can let me go now.”
“Keep tellin’ you when you’re in my arms, I like you where you are.”
“Max –”
His hand in my hair pulled my head back and when I was looking at him he declared, “Next up, we’re talkin’ ‘bout your Dad.”
“I don’t have a Dad.”