invention that was unique. I wondered if he wanted to get rid of me after all, if he wanted me to marry Paul. But whatever his intentions, or his twisted theories, I knew that I loved Peter, and only to a lesser degree, Paul.
And musing over all of it for the hundred millionth time, I put my arms around Paul with the ruby ring still on my finger, and fell asleep, but it was Peter I dreamed about all night as I slept fitfully till morning, not Paul, which told me something.
Chapter Ten
Given everything we'd said to each other the night before, it was very emotional for both of us when Paul left this time. There was no longer the absolute certainty that he would return. I couldn't promise him anything, and he knew it.
“In a few hours, I'll have my head off again, and all my wires hanging out, and you'll be back with him,” he said, looking mournful. “I hate to think about it,” and then he looked at me with greater tenderness than I'd ever seen. “I just want you to be happy, Steph. That's all. Do whatever you have to do.” And I knew, as I looked at him, that he meant it, and I loved him for it.
“Can I still see you if I leave him?” I was worried now about all the things that I'd said. I wasn't feeling quite as brave, and worse yet when he shook his head, and almost started crying.
“No, you can't. It doesn't work like that. I can only stand in for him. I can't see you on my own.”
“But you said … you asked me to marry you last night….” I was confused. Would Peter have been part of it too? What was Paul thinking?
“I was kidding myself, Steph. We could get married, but I'd still be dependent on me.” He said it honestly, he didn't want to lie to her, he never had before and he wasn't going to start now. “I'd have to share you with him, even if you loved me more.”
“Sometimes I think I do.” I was always honest too. But most of the time, I knew just how much I loved Peter.
“I think you're really in love with him, Steph. Maybe you should explain that to him.”
“I'd probably scare him to death,” I said, looking pensive. And what was the point? Our relationship worked perfectly as it was. For him. Why ask for more? Why push it till it broke? I didn't want that.
“As Charlotte says, he's a dork,” Paul editorialized. “Maybe you both are. It could just be you deserve each other. Life is too short to waste what you've got. Or even waste me. It drives me crazy to think I'm going to sit around now, for months, with my head off, while the two of you screw everything up. Just get him to work on his triple flip. But he's a real klutz. He could hurt himself. Be careful.” Paul was trying to cover how emotional he felt about leaving me, and I was especially worried about him when he showed up in black suede leggings with a black sequined jacket and high-heeled black alligator boots. I had never seen him looking so conservative or so somber.
“I don't like leaving you like this, Steph,” he said sadly, “not knowing when I'll see you again, if ever.”
“I suspect you will.” I smiled sheepishly at him. How could you leave a man who had a Klone? Especially one like Paul. “I'm not sure I could ever give either of you up. I think I'm hooked. I may have to go back to Dr. Steinfeld again, to work things out, and that could take forever.”
“Please don't. You don't need him. You know what you want.” He smiled sadly at me, and I could see how much he loved me.
“Take care of yourself,” I said to him as he kissed me for the last time. I was still wearing his ruby ring, and knew I always would. He said he wanted me to keep it.
“Give the kids my love.” They had already left for school. And then, he looked over his shoulder, as the elevator man piled all his luggage into the elevator, and said, “Be happy, Steph, whatever you do.” The door closed behind him before I could answer, and I wondered if I would ever see him again. At that exact moment, I wasn't sure, and I already missed him.
And as I