know what love feels like?”
“Phil, don’t ask this of me.”
“I’m not making a request. I’m telling you how I feel.” She reached into her skirts for the hidden pocket and felt the warm key there. Pulling it out, she pressed it into his palm. “It’s your choice, James. If you want me, then I’m yours. Come to my room, to my bed. This is an invitation, and you are free to accept or decline.” She leaned forward and kissed him. “But I do hope you’ll accept.” She stood. “I have to go back before my mother sends a servant to look for me. You should get back too.”
He stood and pulled her roughly against him. She inhaled sharply, thinking she had angered him, but when he kissed her, the kiss was full of passion, not anger. When her knees began to buckle, she put her arms around his neck and clung to him for support as much as out of desire. Finally, he ended the kiss, and she couldn’t stop herself from pulling his lips back to hers.
“I wish I could stay here,” she murmured against his lips.
“So do I, lass.”
“Goodnight.” On shaky legs, she walked back to the house and let herself inside. Once inside, she leaned against the door and took a deep breath. She’d given him the key and asked. There wasn’t any more she could do. She could only hope he would come to her, but perhaps he had too much honor for that. She couldn’t fault him if that was the case.
The sound of laughter floated toward her from the direction of the card room. She smoothed her hair and her dress and made her way back.
HE WAS AN IDIOT. CLEARLY, he was allowing his cock to think rather than his brain. Why else would he be walking around Mayne House after two in the morning instead of sleeping in his bed? Why was he risking being seen and ruining not only Lady Philomena but getting himself thrown in prison or worse?
As James pushed open the servants’ door to the family’s floor, he had to admit that Phil was worth any risk. He wanted her, whether it was for a minute, an hour, or a night. And if he were caught and sent to Newgate, then at least he’d be saved from Sean and Patrick. When they found out he had not tipped them off about Lady Philomena’s excursion last night, they would probably kill him and dump his body in the Thames.
He made his way down the corridor, cringing when a floorboard creaked, then paused outside Phil’s door. Now was the moment when he really had to summon his courage. Did he dare use the key?
He thought about her on the other side of the door, her hair spread on a pillow, her soft lips parted in sleep, and his hand moved without permission. He slid the key in the lock, turned it, and pushed the door open.
But when he closed the door behind him and turned to look at the bed, he saw it was empty.
“I didn’t think you’d come,” she said. She was sitting in a chair by the fire, her hair loose as he’d imagined, her legs tucked under her, and wearing a silky white dressing gown, tied at the waist.
“Sure and I didn’t think I would either.” He took a step toward her and she waved at the door.
“Lock it, please.”
He swallowed and did as she asked. When he turned back, she was standing.
“I thought ye’d be sleeping,” he said. Her hair was damp. She’d been sitting by the fire to allow it to dry.
“I never can sleep after an outing. My mind is too busy, and it takes me an hour or so to quiet it. Can I confess something to you?”
“I’m no priest, lass. Far from it.” He didn’t dare move too much closer. He intended to wait for her invitation and to give her time and space to reconsider.
“It’s not that sort of confession.” She took a step closer. “Now that you’re here, I find I’m shaking with nerves.”
“Ye can always say no. Give the word, and I’ll go, I will.”
“Oh, I don’t want you to go, James. You’re not nervous at all, are you?”
“That’s not entirely true. I have me own worries.”
She raised her brows. “You have done this before?”
He smiled. “I have once or twice, yes. But I want ye to enjoy it. I want to make it good for ye.”
“You will, James. I know