harder on the trailer door in case she was in the bathroom. “Bristol?”
The same sounds of nature were my only answer.
I sank onto the metal stairs outside the RV. They cut into my ass but I didn’t budge. Should I recite my I’m so damn sorry spiel anyway? Just holler it so she could hear it in the RV or the trailer?
More birds sang. A hawk soared over the pasture behind the trailer, waiting to attack its next meal. I hadn’t eaten lunch. Dinnertime was passing.
Had Bristol eaten?
Probably not. She would’ve come home and thrown herself into work. She would’ve retreated into the giant, solid shell she’d built for herself. And she’d be thinking that what Grams had said was true. That Mama’s death was her fault.
Twenty minutes went by. Her pickup was here. She had to be too.
No Daisy. I got up and went to the barn, checking inside. No Bucket.
Right. She had cattle to check and the four-wheeler wasn’t running reliably, and even if it were, nothing could beat horse therapy when the world turned to shit and you felt like you were alone.
It wasn’t something I did. But I’d asked Xander once in high school why he disappeared so long when he got upset at Dad and that was what he’d said.
Would she come back? I toed the ground.
I’d wait.
I parked my ass on the weathered stairs to the trailer. It was more comfortable than the RV steps. And I waited.
An hour went by. Then another.
Was she hurt again? Maybe Daisy was at my house wondering where the hell I was.
My phone rang and I answered without looking at the caller. “Hey.”
“Hey, Dawson,” Xander answered. “Aiden and I are leaving the hospital with Dad to pick Beck up at the airport. We can get a room if you need the house to yourself.”
“Dad told you what happened?”
“Yep. And we all feel like shit. You talk to her yet?”
“No. She’s not home. She’s out riding, but I’ve been waiting close to three hours.”
“Is there anywhere else she can go?”
“On horseback?” I smacked my palm against my forehead. “The cabin. Dammit.”
“The old hunting cabin out by the wells?”
I’d spent the evening on my ass. I could’ve walked there by now. How was the reception? Was she getting my messages?
Of course, asshole. She probably went to the cabin so you couldn’t reach her.
“Yes. If she’s out there, then she doesn’t want to talk to me.” I blew out a breath. “You might as well stay the night, but I’m not going to be good company.”
“You don’t have to be. We’ll try to help you figure out what to do.”
There wasn’t much I could do if she wouldn’t talk to me. She might want space. She might need it, and that was why she’d gone to the cabin.
I’d respect that. It was the least I could do.
“I’ll be right there.”
“We’ll grab some pizza at the gas station.”
“That’s crap pizza, don’t bother. I’ll make dinner. It’ll get my mind off today.” Nothing would get my mind off today, but I’d rather be cooking in the kitchen than sitting on the couch, staring at the wall, and ruminating over everything that had happened.
“See you there.” Xander hung up.
I dropped my arm and stared at the RV. Then I looked around the yard. Tidier than it’d ever been. Bristol had gotten the Weed Eater working, sharpened the lawn mower blades, and tuned up the riding lawn mower. She’d removed old car parts, sold an old John Deere 4450 that hadn’t run in twenty years, and used the money to buy nicer matching posts for the section of fence that bordered the yard.
Signs of her were everywhere. But she wasn’t around. Because of me.
Chapter 15
Bristol
I put the arc welder down and took off my helmet.
This motherfucking piece of— I kicked the workbench. The chunk of metal I was using to make a new hay tine for the raking fork clattered to the floor. Nothing was going right today. I didn’t have to be a genius to know why.
First off, I’d slept like crap. No, that wasn’t the first thing that’d gone wrong, but I didn’t want to think about yesterday. Emilia Boyd’s words had run through my mind on a loop last night. The crickets and frogs hadn’t drowned the memory out.
My stomach cramped. I hadn’t packed more than a couple of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to take with me. They’d comprised lunch and dinner yesterday and breakfast this morning. I’d made sure Daisy