understand why I want to leave. He’s still supportive, but me moving away is still a sore subject between the two of us.
My father, always the skeptic, believes that I’m only moving back to St. Louis for one reason. Even though I’ve told him he’s wrong, my father is hard-headed, so he just gives me that look and we change the subject.
My mother’s thinking is in line with my dad’s, but she doesn’t give me as much grief about it. I think it’s because she just wants to be supportive of her daughter, just like she always has been. When I told her I wanted to become a nurse like her, she had my back, and gladly paid my way through college so I could get my BSN in nursing and work at Providence Alaska Medical Center with her the past couple of years. Mom has been in my corner the whole time, so the emotion she’s showing tonight isn’t a surprise.
“So, there’s nothing I can do to make you change your mind?” Mom says as she follows me into the kitchen. I put my wine glass in the sink and face her with a smile.
“Not likely,” I reply. “But I’m glad you care so much.”
“Well, I do,” she replies as my dad walks in and stands behind her. He has a stern expression on his face and folds his arms with an attitude. “So, can I ask you a question? And I want you to be honest with me, Alannah. Okay?”
I feel a pang of nervousness hit me. Where is this about to go?
“Kind of freaking me out with the sudden seriousness.”
“Well, me and your dad are just curious about this whole thing. I mean, how do you even know he’s still there?”
My face grows a mind of its own and twists into a confused frown.
“What are you talking about? Who?”
“Don’t play, Alannah,” my father finally chimes in, breaking his night-long silence. I’m still not used to seeing him with a beard, but he’s growing it out since he retired. “Let’s not pretend you’re moving back to St. Louis because you love it there. Let’s just be honest, alright? We know who this is about.”
“Oh my gosh, Dad. I get so tired of having this same conversation,” I snip, folding my arms and mirroring his demeanor. “I’m moving to St. Louis because Mercy Hospital hired me, and I did always like it there, whether you believe it or not. I loved St. Louis, and I didn’t want to leave. So, I’m twenty-five years old now, and I’m moving to a place I know I love. That’s all there is to it.”
The two of them glance at each other like they figured I was going to say that and they’re amused I actually did.
“I don’t want to argue about it, especially since you’re leaving in a couple of days,” my father says. “We just want to make sure you’re doing this for the right reasons, and I don’t want to see you get hurt because you’re hoping to rekindle something you had when you were fifteen. I just don’t want you to get your hopes up because I don’t want you to be disappointed.”
“Ugh. Well, thanks for caring, but it’s not about that. I mean, come on, it’s been ten years. I’d be crazy to still be thinking about Dominic after all this time. I was a teenager. It’s just time for me to venture out on my own, and I want to do it in the place I loved the most as a kid, so that’s what I’m doing.”
I know they don’t believe me. It’s written all over both of their faces and sewn into their body language, but they don’t say it. They decide to drop the subject for now, and the three of us go back into the living room with the guests, where we spend the rest of the night reminiscing and ignoring the tension between us.
Dominic doesn’t get mentioned again for the rest of the night, but after the party’s over and I’m in the taxi headed back to my place, the truth about Dominic is all I can think about.
Of course I’ve been thinking about Dominic this whole time. It doesn’t matter that it’s been ten years. The way I felt about Dominic when I was fifteen is still the way I feel about him now. It’s not like we ended with some horrible breakup that made us hate each other. It ended against