did. After he ghosted me, I never expected to see him again, let alone be in the same section in band! I think I would have preferred it if he just kept ignoring me like at rookie camp, but everywhere I go on campus, there he is! Ready and waiting to make my life even more miserable! Which makes no sense! He’s obviously moved on with all the women he sleeps with! Why stick around just to fuck with me if he has no interest in fucking me? And the worst part? The worst part of it all?” I suck in a deep breath. Saying this out loud is going to be freeing, yes, but it’s also going to hurt. “I’m obviously still not over it. If I were, I just … wouldn’t care what he does anymore.”
“That’s why you never joined ITK,” Shannon murmurs, her eyes clouding with a thoughtful glaze. “Well, you know what? Even better then. Stick it to him now with your pointy crown, then walk away with your head held high like the queen you can really be once you let this go.”
Shannon is a feminist to her very core, but she’s missing something important.
“I hate to break it to you, but no queen would ever use her feminine charms for such a selfish end.”
“I hate to break it to you,” she argues, “but every woman wears a crown. Sometimes, they’re a little crooked, but that’s why we have friends. To help us straighten up when we need it.”
I reach my arms up like a little kid, and she doesn’t disappoint.
We hug it out like the queens we are.
“I love you, Shan.”
“I love you too, Soph. Now, let’s make some misogynistic bastards squirm.”
That’s my girl.
Chapter Five
Blow hard. Finger fast.
I blink at the words staring back at me from eye-level. Unfortunately, when I glance up at Jimbo’s face, the smug grin on his lips indicates he thinks I’m staring at the soft fabric stretched across his impressive pecs.
“Wow. Classy.” I cough away my sarcasm. Acting seductive is going to be more difficult than anticipated. “Funny. I mean, it’s funny! How did you come up with that? You’re so clever.”
That didn’t sound genuine. Not even a little. Shannon was right—I have my work cut out for me.
He tips his gaze to my hoodie that reads Miners Marching Band. Not all that funny. Not at all unexpected. For me. The self-reformed bad girl who learned all too early that risks don’t always come with rewards.
I fight the instinct to recoil when he leans down into my personal space with a poor imitation of collusion in his expression.
“Tim had them made in the spring for all the drum majors except you. I’m sorry. I’ll give you mine if you want.”
“Why would you do that?” I blurt. You hate me.
Damn it. I make a mental list of anyone in band who is also a theater major. I need acting lessons and fast.
Jimbo’s face twists up so much that it honestly looks like he’s suffering from constipation. “I don’t want you to feel left out.”
Oh. Ohhhhh.
Pretending is as hard for him as it is for me. Unnatural. Defying the written laws of existence in this time and this place.
That alone makes me feel better.
“That’s okay, James.” I try out my best purr. “I’m actually already sweating. I was just going to get rid of a few layers.”
Sweating. Nerves. James.
The memories sweep me away like a tsunami. I called him that the night we shared together during a sweltering summer in a faraway college dorm without any AC. We were adults, diving into the rushing waters of freedom, and testing out my expected cries of ecstasy using Jimmy just felt wrong in the moment.
His pupils dilate, and his nostrils flare just slightly. Either he’s remembering it too, or he really is constipated this morning.
Probably the latter.
His reaction works for me regardless of the reason. If I make him shit his pants on the field, then that could still help me get head drum major. And be as embarrassing for him as the truth he sprang on our fellow drum majors last night was for me.
Our latest staredown is interrupted by Nate jogging over to us. He’s panting like he ran a marathon, and his eyes are a shade panicked.
In all fairness, drum majors are expected to be on the practice field first thing in the morning, already warmed up and hyped to lead the rest of the band through warm-ups when they