‘I’ve got to be in Shanghai for a meeting first thing.’
‘You came all the way for Wilkie’s party?’
‘More or less. Bonny’s in London doing a television programme. I’ll be back later in the autumn and we’ll get Wilkie up and running. How’s Alan getting on with her biography?’
‘Not much to write about.’
‘He can write about today, it’s been a great party.’
He kissed her on the cheek and she resisted the urge to cling to him. ‘Thank you for the lovely champagne and being so sweet to everyone.’
‘Hetta!’ Lester Bolton accosted her five minutes later. ‘Will you introduce me to Valent?’
‘I’m so sorry, he’s gone.’
Bolton looked furious. ‘We need to have a serious talk about the syndicate,’ he said ominously.
Etta was relieved to be distracted by the arrival of Dora, who had passed all her GCSEs and had spent a lot of the holidays teaching Mrs Wilkinson new tricks.
Mrs Wilkinson frequently stuck out her tongue when she was trying hard in a race, or, knowing it would get a laugh, for a Polo. She had now learnt to make faces. When asked to do her John Prescott face, she would screw her mouth and nose up, but, much more dangerously, when asked to do her Tilda Flood face, she curled her lip and stuck out her top teeth, which had people in stitches.
Alas, Trixie in a brief attempt at conciliation had told her mother, Carrie, about this trick. Increasingly irked by the closeness she saw developing between Alan and buck-toothed Tilda, and punchy on too much champagne, Carrie asked Dora to make Mrs Wilkinson do her Tilda Flood face.
Not realizing that Tilda, who’d been dealing with a hot water failure upsetting the holiday-letters in Shagger’s cottage, had just wandered in late to the party, Dora and Mrs Wilkinson obliged at length, to screams of laughter.
Witnessing everything, utterly mortified, Tilda clapped her hands over her teeth. Instantly the laughter petered out. Looking round, Dora felt as though she’d missed a step in the dark.
‘I’m so sorry, Tilda,’ she wailed. ‘It’s only a silly joke.’
‘Come on, Tilda,’ called out Carrie. ‘Can’t you laugh at yourself?’
But a sobbing Tilda had fled up the road, back to School Cottage. She must somehow scrape together the money to get her teeth fixed. She’d been home for the weekend to a mother with eyes full of questions, who so longed for a grandchild to boast about at bridge parties. Learning Tilda was coaching the ravishing Trixie, one of the Greycoats teachers had asked her if she was coming out at last.
Back at the party, this was definitely a Miss Bates moment as an outraged Alan bawled Carrie out for being an absolute bitch.
Carrie was not the only bitch. As Trixie was clearly having a row with Josh in the orchard, Seth returned to the cool of Etta’s bungalow with Romy.
‘Move, dog,’ she ordered Priceless, who ignored her, so she had to sit very close to Seth. Opening the last bottle of Valent’s champagne, he filled up their glasses.
‘Awful she hasn’t got a single photograph of Sampson here,’ chuntered Romy. ‘There’s one of Trixie and that ghastly goat and Mrs Wilkinson and Valent, but none of Drummond and Poppy.’
‘She sees enough of them,’ said Seth reasonably. ‘Sampson sounds a brute.’
‘He was Yang personified.’ Then Romy added roguishly, ‘Have you noticed my mother-in-law has such a crush on you she gave you the biggest mountain of chilli and she trembles every time you speak to her?’
Seth was transfixed by Romy’s smiling, full, red lips and the warm brown softness of her cleavage. Were her breasts brown all over? Very tanked up, he murmured that he had a confession to make.
‘I intended to ask you to lunch back in July, but Stefan by mistake took my letter to the wrong Mrs Bancroft.’
Romy couldn’t stop laughing, peal after peal worthy of Tower Captain Pocock.
‘Etta thought you were madly in love with her? Oh Seth, how priceless.’ She gave the dog a light tap. ‘She does give herself airs. Did you explain you meant me?’
‘I couldn’t disillusion her.’
‘That isn’t fair, leading her on, letting her look after your dog all the time.’
‘“I do love nothing in the world so well as you,” ‘ murmured Seth, taking her hand. ‘“Is not that strange?”’ Then, when Romy raised an eyebrow: ‘Much Ado – Act 4. I’m devoted to Etta, she’s terrific for her age and must have been stunning in her youth. It was a genuine mistake.’