narrowing his eyes. “Maybe you’ll never see me again.”
Esmeralda stared back at him, feeling the war inside herself between the part of her that craved him and shivered at his touch, and the smarter part, the one that knew he would only destroy her life if they stayed together.
“You don’t have anything to say?” he asked.
Esmeralda sighed and folded her arms. “You need someone to order you around, don’t you, Tommy? Somebody in command, like Ashleigh, always telling you what to do. I give you your freedom to be anything you want to be, and all you do is piss yourself away.”
He glowered at her, his jaw grinding inside his cheek. He looked like a mad dog.
“So you think I’m worthless. Anything else?” he snarled.
“I did not say that.”
“You basically did.”
“I have to work, Tommy.” Esmeralda started for the door.
“I might not be here when you get back,” he called after her.
Esmeralda resisted the temptation to turn around and say anything. She walked out the door, closed it firmly behind her, and started down the concrete stairwell.
When she returned from work that evening, Tommy and his clothes were gone. So was the gold 1908 Indian-head coin he’d given her when they’d first met as children. She didn’t know if he was keeping it as a reminder of her, or taking it away to show her that they were finished.
Either way, at least her mother would be pleased to hear that Tommy was gone. Maybe she would start talking to Esmeralda again.
Chapter Twenty
Jenny awoke the day after Christmas to find Seth sitting up in bed, staring at her with a very serious look on his face. Bad sign. He usually slept much later than Jenny. She wondered if he remembered—
“Are you really pregnant?” he asked.
Jenny hesitated. “Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
She pushed her blankets off, then lifted up her nightdress and threw it on the floor. She took his hand and placed it on her swollen belly.
“Feel that?”
His eyes widened. “How pregnant are you?”
“Between four and five months, is my best guess. You haven’t noticed me getting bigger?”
“A little, but I thought it was all the, you know, cheeses and chocolates and heavy French sauces...”
“You thought I was getting fat.”
“I wasn’t going to say anything. Four months? Have you been to a doctor? Why haven’t you said anything?”
“I told you why. I can’t have children, they almost always miscarry. The few times that hasn’t happened, the baby dies on the way out. They can’t handle my poxy birth canal.”
“Okay...but isn’t there another way, where they take the baby right out?”
“A C-section,” Jenny said. “I’ve thought about it, but it’s very rare that my baby even lives long enough to try that.”
“But it’s possible,” Seth said.
“I don’t know. The technology’s never been there before.” She shook her head. One bad thing about having so many past-life memories was that she tended think of her present options as being limited by her past experience. “We could try, but it still probably won’t be safe enough...”
“But I’ll be there,” Seth said. “If the baby needs healing, I can do it.” He stroked her stomach, and Jenny felt the warm glow of his healing touch, passing right through her and into the baby. The baby stirred in response, and feeling it move nearly broke her heart. “He’s not going to die if I can do anything about it.”
“Or she,” Jenny said. “Or...it’s better not to think of it as ‘he’ or ‘she.’”
“Can’t the doctors tell by now?”
“I guess they could. That’s not my point, Seth. You’re getting your hopes up, but I have lifetimes of experience showing me it’s hopeless. It’s better to just accept that.”
“No.” He shook his head. “I might not have all your memories, but I know we can change. We’re not stuck with what happened in the past. Jenny, I think we can make it work.”
Jenny dared to consider whether he might be right.
“If the baby doesn’t survive, you’re going to hate me,” she said.
“No, I won’t.”
“But you’ll realize that being with me isn’t the best thing for you. You could be with someone else and have a much easier, happier life. Someone like...” Mariella.
“Someone like who?” Seth asked. “It doesn’t matter. I love you, Jenny. I always will. And I want to have this child with you.” He took her hands.
“Seth...” Jenny suddenly found herself sobbing, and she buried her face in his shoulder. “Stupid pregnant hormones.”
“Even your hormones are pregnant?”
“Yep.” She looked up at him. “Do you mean it? You want