brother.” Sela helped him to his quarters. He dropped Diel to the bed and moved to the window seat. He turned off the lights, leaving only a single candle to give him light as he picked up his sketchpad and began to draw.
Diel closed his eyes, and all he could see was Noa. All he could feel. As heat spread through his veins, he tensed and tried to push back the monster. But the monster hadn’t moved from its lair. At all. No, that warmth had come from the memory of Noa in Diel’s own, monster-free mind.
His lip curled in disgust. It only made him want to kill her more.
Chapter 10
Noa threw back her head, then clutched the knives in her hands even tighter. Her body was shaking, but not with fear or trepidation. It was shaking with the sudden rush of adrenaline, with the fucking bliss that came with sinking blades into still-beating hearts and staring into shocked eyes as the life drained from their souls.
Noa stared down at the priest beneath her, at the blood dropping from his mouth and his chest slowing as the stab wound took effect. But it wasn’t enough; it was never enough with these men. So Noa twisted the blade, the last of the priest’s fight allowing him to release a final guttering scream.
She closed her eyes and let that sound of agony wash over her, seep into her bones. She felt the darkness within her move and devour the scream, allowing its fear-filled notes to feed its insatiable hunger for death, for revenge …
Noa’s blood sang as the darkness warmed her muscles, as it calmed her more than any drug ever could.
She was the darkness.
The darkness was her …
… and she was never giving it up.
Noa sat upright in bed. Her breathing was labored, and sweat clung to her body like a second layer of skin. Her soaked pink hair was stuck to the back of her neck and cheeks.
The dream … it was the dream. Noa’s blood rushed through her body, as if it was searching for the darkness she had just dreamed about. Like a child awaiting the return of a parent, frantic and excited at the prospect of being united once again after too much time forced apart.
And Noa wanted to submit. She wanted nothing more than to lower the iron gate that kept the two parts of her separated. She wanted to just fucking rest and let the twin parts of her soul re-merge, so she could be at peace. To stop the torture that plagued her daily.
Noa lifted her shaking hand and pushed the sweaty pink strands of hair from her face. She tipped her head back and stared at the white-painted ceiling. Diel. This was due to Diel.
From the minute he had wrapped his hand around her neck in the priest’s home, he had awoken a long-slumbering part of her. He hadn’t just awoken it; his internal monster had roared at the blackened part of her soul to rise and take its place at the forefront of her body once again.
She could feel it now, circling her body, looking for any loose brick in her fortress. Threatening. Stalking. Promising that it would it find its way through soon.
Noa knew she should be fighting it. Pushing it back like she had vowed to do. Noa could lie to everyone else, reassure her sisters, that she was okay, that she was in control.
But she couldn’t lie to herself. And just remembering blue eyes looking over her like they possessed X-ray vision, she knew there was one person who saw through her bullshit too.
Diel. Diel, with his monster who had placed Noa in its sights.
Noa threw back the comforter, stepped into the shower, and turned it to its coldest setting. She ducked under the icy spray and tried to take back hold of her senses. But her darkness was stronger, thrashing at her walls, heavy artillery pounding at her weakening defenses.
So she took herself to the place that always gave her a swift victory. To glazed eyes and a parted mouth. Skin and bones and graying skin.
Noa’s fists clenched on the tiles before her as the water sluiced down her back. Her darkness had caused that tragedy. Her thirst for blood and revenge had caused that irreparable sin that she could never forgive herself for.
Noa held her breath and fought back the threatening force within her, reminding herself over and over again why it had to be this way.