together. I was terrified of what was happening, terrified of what I might be carrying. But now, with Kiyo on my side, I felt safe. We would get through this together, and I suddenly wanted to connect with him and feel his love around me.
He responded instantly to the kiss, one of his hands tipping my head back in order to consume more of my lips. His other hand gripped my upper arm, nails lightly scratching my skin as animal lust began to take over. Then, abruptly, he stopped and pulled away.
"What's wrong?" I asked. I started to say he didn't have to worry about getting me pregnant, but that joke seemed kind of inappropriate.
"Nothing ... I'm just ... I'm just tired." He kissed me again, but this time it was on my cheek. "It's been a long day. Just not up for it tonight ... even though you're as sexy as always."
The lightness in those last words seemed forced, and I was glad he couldn't see my frown in the darkness. I had just been rejected because ... because why? Having sex during pregnancy wasn't harmful, I knew that much. Was I repulsive? Was the thought that I was carrying Storm King's heir putting him off? Whatever the reason, I didn't buy that he "wasn't up for it." We'd been pressed hip to hip moments ago, and his body had most certainly been up for it.
A sexless night was the least of my problems, and although neither of us spoke, I knew he slept as badly as I did. We tossed and turned, our movements as disturbing to each other as our individual worries. We both had bloodshot eyes when we woke.
I headed off to the Otherworld as soon as I could after breakfast - well, after what passed as breakfast for me. My appetite was still low. Jasmine wasn't happy when I denied her request to come with me, but Kiyo and Volusian's presence was too daunting for her to put up much of a fight.
I felt the Thorn Land's welcoming energy when I crossed over, but thankfully, it revealed nothing about my maternal state. My staff was equally happy to see me, particularly Shaya, who looked like she'd thought I wasn't ever going to return. It wasn't an entirely unwarranted fear. She and I sat alone in one of the parlors while she updated me on the situation.
"Rurik feels the Rowan Land is stable enough to move in a governing body. There's still some unrest, and he'll stay on for a while, but most have accepted your rule. It's the way things go. He's also culled the Rowan military and feels you can trust who's left."
I tried not to grimace at that, wondering what his "culling" had entailed. "And Katrice and Cassius?"
She shrugged. "Still imprisoned. Awaiting your verdict."
"I don't really want to do anything with them," I admitted. "I don't know what to do with them."
"Honestly? With Katrice? You could set her free, and it wouldn't matter. Stripping the land from her stripped most of her magic. Her reason to live. She's harmless. Without hope. But Cassius ..." Shaya frowned. "He's dangerous. He can't wrestle the land from you, but he's got enough power to make trouble. Dorian's already written and advised execution."
I scoffed. "I'm sure he has."
"Dorian's also provided a list of people he'd like to see installed in the Rowan Land. We settled the resources split, but he feels he deserves a controlling interest in your rule there."
"A 'controlling interest?' This isn't a corporation!" I exclaimed. "Write him and make it very, very clear that his help isn't needed over there. It isn't wanted. He has no right to it. Tell him all of that."
Shaya hesitated, fretfully toying with one of her black braids. "No matter how diplomatically I word that ... well, the antagonism will still come through. It'll anger him."
"Good," I retorted. Dorian was a safe target for my churning emotions at the moment, and God knew I needed some sort of outlet. "Let him be angry or pout or whatever. I'm pretty sure he isn't going to declare war on me."
It was something I'd figured out recently. Dorian had been an advocate of using the Iron Crown to scare other monarchs, but the thing was, now that we weren't together anymore, he had to realize it could be used against him too. I actually hadn't had to give in to his "spoils of war" demands. That had been a kindness on my