his life wasn’t his own. He had already bared his soul to Jackson.
Before Day could even get the words out to protest, Jackson was pulling them out of Day’s room, taking the equipment from them and re-entering the room on his own, bringing only Linc with him. Somehow, that was better. Linc was Jackson’s best friend. Wyatt and Linc had lots of kinky sex. There was nothing in there that would shock Linc or cause him to look at Jackson differently. Day never wanted to be an embarrassment to Jackson.
By the time the team was gone, Day’s nerves were frayed. Jackson made them a quick dinner and put on a movie, but the moment Jackson set his plate down, Day was on him, stripping him bare and riding him right there on the sofa, channeling all his nervous energy into the one thing he could control, the one thing that made him feel good. Jackson let him control the speed, the intensity, jerking Day in time with his thrusts, until they got off and Day’s head was quiet for just a little while.
“Why didn’t he put cameras in the bedrooms? Do you think he was interrupted?” Day asked Jackson when they were lying naked and sated on the couch. The only light in the room was a random scenic picture on the television screen saver.
Jackson gazed down at Day where he was lying between Jackson’s splayed legs, head on his thigh, Jackson’s soft cock close enough to feel Day’s breath each time he spoke.
“Maybe. He clearly knows we’re in a physical relationship. Maybe he didn’t think it was necessary since we’ve been uploading to your website. Maybe he didn’t want to interrupt his fantasies about being your first.”
Day shivered at the idea. How could somebody he barely knew become so fixated on him? “Do you think this is my fault? Do you think I brought this on myself?” he asked, finally voicing the thought that had been circulating in his head since Wyatt and Charlie had implied he might know his stalker.
Jackson ran his fingers through Day’s hair. “No. Of course not. You didn’t do anything wrong. Just because some psycho has an imaginary relationship with you, it doesn’t mean you did anything to provoke it. It’s no different than a stalker imagining a relationship with a celebrity.”
Day pushed his head up into Jackson’s caress, not satisfied with his answer. “Celebrities don’t tweet about needing somebody to use their hole. They don’t call their clients Daddy. I put myself out there. I let them think they stood a chance.”
Jackson shook his head. “You’re offering clients a fantasy, an escape. No sane person out there thinks that the person on these chat services is actually offering up their bodies. Not unless explicitly stated.”
Day’s stomach twisted. “Except, I did explicitly state it. I offered up my virginity to the highest bidder, knowing full well nobody would ever really be able to meet my price. I knew there was nobody on that site I would be willing to have sex with, on or off camera. I just wanted to make enough money to get out of LA. I hate it here.”
“You do?” Jackson asked. “You never told me you wanted to leave LA.”
Day shrugged. “Why would I? I never expected us to be…whatever this is. I never expected to meet somebody who gave a shit where I lived or what I did for a living. I know what I am to people. A body to use. A hole to fill. They don’t care about my day or if I eat. They don’t care if I can’t pay my rent or if I need to go to the doctor. And that was fine. It is fine. It was just an exchange. They gave me money, and I gave them my time. I gave them the fantasy. It was a way to keep a roof over my head or food in my stomach without having to trick on the street. I never anticipated you.”
Jackson dragged his blunt nails across Day’s scalp. “If it makes you feel better, I never anticipated you, either. And you are so much more than just a hole to fill or a body to use. I wish you could see you the way I do.”
Tears pricked behind Day’s eyes at Jackson’s words, but he didn’t press. He wasn’t sure if it made him feel better or worse that Jackson saw him as something more. His words kicked up a tornado in