a Draicon who had barely survived an alligator attack. He was quite old, about 980 years, and in a great deal of pain and couldn’t move. He begged and begged us to just end it. I asked Grandpere, but he told us it was forbidden. Only the Kallan had the power over ending a life. Grandpere took the elderly Draicon back to our cabin and called upon the Kallan. It seemed like only hours later the Kallan arrived. He spent a few hours with the Draicon, and immediately after his arrival, the elderly man seemed at peace. He was happy to go, and grateful.
“I was so much in awe of the Kallan. He seemed wise, immensely courageous and yet he had compassion and allowed someone in so much pain to pass through to the Other Realm. He was more respected than anyone I knew. I thought he was invincible. I wanted to be just like him.
“And later, I found out, he wasn’t invincible. Because every Kallan has a breaking point when he wishes he were invincible. And he finds out the worst way that he isn’t. There are some situations where he is totally helpless.”
“And how does he feel about it?” Her voice was the barest whisper.
His jaw seemed set in stone. “He wants to die inside.”
Flames danced in the reflection of his dark eyes. He seemed to struggle with something to say.
Raphael removed his arm, studied his hands. “The basement, back at the abandoned farmhouse. When your pack was torturing me, it wasn’t the physical pain that undid me.”
She waited in silence, holding her breath, not wanting to distract him. Tension thickened the air between them.
“It was the damn memories.” He glanced at her, a tic visible in his cheek. “I thought when we first met, you shied away from me because of your bloodlines. Your superior lineage.”
At her headshake, he continued. “I know it now. But it’s always been a shadow in my past. Dodging my footsteps wherever I went. When someone made the mistake of calling me mongrel—” he reached for the Sacred Scian, flipped the blade into the air “—I showed them the unfriendly side of my knife.”
A shudder raced through her at the grim set of his jaw.
“There was an incident that happened to me as a child. It forever marked me, and though I put it behind me, it was reason for me to strive to be the best. Prove to others I was stronger, more powerful.”
Horror pulsed through her as he slowly relayed the details. She could smell the sweetness of the peach juice, hear the jeers of the pureblood French Draicon, feel the young Raphael’s deep shame. Emily gripped her hands together, knowing that if she showed pity he would break.
“It’s the main reason why I became Kallan. To show others I could not be bested and no one would ever do anything like that again. I suppose I came to the job with bad intentions.”
When he fell silent, staring at the fire, she told him what was in her heart.
“When you came here, I wasn’t afraid of you, only suspicious and angry. And then when I realized who you were, and how you acted toward me, what you were willing to do in giving me the Scian, the symbol of your power, I realized something else. I knew you were the greatest Draicon of all. It had nothing to do with the depth of your power. It had everything to do with the depth of your heart.”
Her voice dropped to a bare whisper. “That’s the greatest power of all—to know others’ needs and put them before your own. It was this ability Aibelle saw in you, Raphael. And that’s why she made you Kallan and gave you this honor. Nothing else.”
Something seemed to lift from his shoulders. He turned to her solemnly and held out his arms. She went to him and hugged him, feeling his fingers tunnel through her hair.
“Tell me about your brothers. Are they much like you? What do they enjoy?”
He talked about everything—from how they liked playing basketball, football, baseball and electronic games to the close bonds they shared. The cuckoo clock ticked as he spoke. Marking time, each second slipping away like sand pouring through opened fingers. Emily swallowed past a lump in her throat. No sadness. She wanted to take tonight and hold it close, cherish it as a precious memory.
For a few moments they let the crackling fire break the silence. Relishing the solitude