I can do more things for his campaign and be a part of his key staff once he wins.”
“Love it.” Raina bobbed her head. “Nikki, what say you?”
Nikki laughed, a vacant, lifeless laugh. “I’m sooo not in. I tried, remember? I failed.”
“You didn’t fail!” Sienna yelled. “You got—”
“Knocked up. And my band left me in the dust. James went to grad school, I had another kid, and staying at home made more sense. Life happened, my dreams ended.”
I stood and hugged her. I wasn’t a hugger, but I knew she needed it. “Then let’s reform your goal. You don’t want to leave your kids at home. I get it. But you could start off slow. You can write songs and compose music from home, right?”
“Right, but I want to be on stage. I miss it.”
“Then do some gigs, start small.”
“Who’s going to take care of the kids when I go to these nightly gigs?” Nikki waved her hand, but her eyes were different. There was longing there.
It was clear she wanted to go for it, so I pushed the pedal. “I’ll babysit for you. You know that.”
“Me too.” Raina and Sienna chimed in.
“And hello, grandparents!” Raina quickly added.
“I guess I could try—”
“She’s in!” Raina interrupted and went straight into boss mode. “We’re meeting every week, come hell or high water. No excuses, and we hold each other accountable. Agreed?”
“Agreed,” we all said back to her.
“Let’s make a toast,” Raina lifted her glass, and we followed suit. “To finding our happiness!”
CHAPTER 3
Not-So-Darling Nikki—Nikki
I was up to counting a gazillion sheep, and those wooly assholes still hadn’t helped me get to sleep. And who in their right mind would be comforted by a sheep’s creepy and judge-y eyes?
It wasn’t the sheep’s fault. I blamed Raina. And since she’d dropped the bomb on us reactivating our group over a week ago, I’d been downing warm milk and whatever bullshit remedy that came up on my Google search.
Bleep! Bleep! Bleep!
The alarm clock reminded me of a tractor-trailer backing up to unload its wares. I usually needed something loud and obnoxious to wake me up, but not today. Rolling over, I swiped the sleep system remote from the nightstand and adjusted the bed’s setting to a flat position. I hadn’t adjusted it much—just enough so that James wouldn’t give me an “I spent too much money on this bed for you not to use it” speech. It’s a bed, a soft one with a softer pillow. I hadn’t always had the luxury. My father was a traveling man, and a music man. He gave me my talent, or according to my mother, my curse.
I sighed heavily as I wrestled to shut the steel door in my mind, that led to the past. During all this, James had remained sound asleep. No surprise there. Lucky bastard. Not even the loud racket from our kids could wake him up.
Shuffling out of bed, I quietly navigated around, picked up my robe from the chaise lounge, and zombie-walked my way to the kids’ rooms. Per my usual routine, I veered toward my daughter Bria’s room first.
My baby was sound asleep, clinging to her overstuffed teddy bear. She’d be turning nine in a few months. The thought of her getting older plucked at my heartstrings like a bass guitar. When I first found out I was having her, I hadn’t reacted well. James had just been accepted into his MBA program and my band was finally starting to get a decent following. I had all but decided to have an abortion. I sat by myself in the parking lot, and despite James’s protest, I was determined to go through with it.
Then I felt it—a flutter. It obviously wasn’t a physical manifestation from my baby, but something else. Like her soul was stirring. After I felt it, I knew I couldn’t abort the baby. I was twenty-three years old, a college graduate, and the baby was made in love. Things could’ve been a whole lot worse. I turned the ignition on, drove away, and never looked back.
“Wake up, Bria-bree.”
My mini-me smiled and lifted her arms in the air. I bent over and gave her the hug I knew she wanted.
“I had the best dream, Mommy.”
“What were you dreaming ’bout, baby girl?” I pulled at the blankets that James had tucked tight around her body.
“People were shouting your name. And you were singing, but not around the house, in a big, big place.”
My heart thudded and I furrowed my brows, trying to