Illusions of Love - By Michelle Betham Page 0,185

and he was almost certain that, after what he planned to do, he wouldn’t be welcome at the bar. Far wiser to bring his own refreshment.

Finally, everything was set. He had everything he needed to proceed. It was going so perfectly it almost scared him, but then, in reality, nothing scared Jimmy Cash. Nothing. And nothing ever would. Because, if Charley thought that him killing Terry had been an horrific payback that could never be repeated, she was wrong. And she was about to find out just how wrong she could be.

***

Michael sat by the bar, downing his bourbon far faster than he should have been. In fact, he shouldn’t really have been downing it at all – doctor’s orders. Lay off the alcohol, the saturated fat, the sugar… Jesus, was there anything in the way of fun left for him to enjoy? He looked over towards Layla who was talking to one of the assistant directors, beautiful and positively glowing in a pale green dress, her blond hair loose around her shoulders. Yeah, of course there were still things out there to enjoy. A new beginning, that’s what. Another chance to begin again with a woman who’d proved that, on more than one occasion, she wasn’t going to give up on him without a fight, and he’d be stupid to ignore that. Again. He’d be stupid to ignore that just so he could waste time concentrating on something that was never going to happen.

He was slowly starting to accept that India really was never going to come back to him. But this time it felt different. This time there was almost a feeling of inevitability about it. This time it was going to be easier because that heart attack had changed him, changed the way he thought about things. He’d been given a second chance to make things right and he wasn’t going to waste whatever was left of his life chasing an impossible dream. Not when he had someone as beautiful and as loyal as Layla by his side. No, this time he was going to start living the life he should have started living a long time ago. A life that didn’t consist of him waking up every morning wishing India was there with him, because he didn’t. Not really. Not anymore. He didn’t wish she was there with him. Not all the time. She wasn’t his first waking thought or his last sleeping dream; she was just India – mother of his son, somebody he could never cut out of his life but somebody he was finally learning to love in a completely different way.

Taking another sip of bourbon he glanced over towards his ex-wife. She was cosying up to Dominic MacDonald as they chatted to a group of interns who’d been acting as on-set runners and seemed slightly overwhelmed that the movie’s two main stars were giving them the time of day.

Dominic MacDonald. The son he’d never known he had. Michael sighed, pushing a hand through his hair, leaning back against the bar, closing his eyes for a few seconds. Part of him was curious to get to know this young man that had crash-landed into his life in the most unexpected of ways, but part of him still felt there was a need to keep some kind of distance, after all, Dominic had hardly expressed a strong desire to start calling him daddy, had he? He’d all but warned Michael off. But he was his son, and that actually meant something to Michael. Now. So, maybe it was going to be up to him to make the first move. Up to him to try and make a complicated situation that little bit easier to deal with.

‘You okay? You look tired.’

Michael swung round on his stool to find India standing beside him. ‘Oh, erm, yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Just been a long few months, that’s all. I think it’s all finally catching up with me.’

She smiled, sliding up onto the stool next to him. ‘Tell me about it. We certainly don’t do things by halves, do we?’

He smiled back, clasping his hands together on the bar in front of him. ‘No. I guess we thrive on complicated, huh?’

‘Hmm. You might be right there, Mikey.’

His heart lurched in his chest as she called him by the name she’d always used to use when they were happy – in love. Together.

She turned to look at him, almost reading his mind, catching him totally by surprise when she

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