I Have Lived and I Have Loved - Willow Winters Page 0,64

Ryan’s gaze on me, but I bent over to finish my worksheet.

His foot went to the book rest underneath my seat, and he pulled my chair toward his. He drew me close enough that our legs pressed against each other’s. “What happened there?”

I shrugged. “Beats me.” But I was grinning. I almost felt silly.

Something felt right. For once.

Ryan didn’t push it. I knew he’d ask later, and I’d tell him. Cora was his friend. He’d be happy.

After a few more minutes, I stopped trying to fill out my worksheet. My concentration was useless, so I sat back and studied the way Cora and Kirk were half-flirting/half-studying each other. They both knew something new was happening, but neither fully understood what it was.

Ryan gave me the answers for the few problems I didn’t have done, and after class, I hurried to catch up with Cora.

I bumped into her arm, grinning.

She looked over and ducked her head, but I saw her smile.

“So.” I jerked a thumb toward Kirk, who was headed toward his locker. “What was that about?”

“You know.” She weaved over, deliberately bumping back into me. “I took your advice to heart.”

“That you aren’t miserable?”

She laughed, shaking her head. “No. Well, yes.” We veered toward her locker.

I went with her and Ryan passed us, moving toward his. But he looked back with the same questioning expression on his face.

Later, I mouthed, and he nodded, stopping at Kirk’s locker first.

“Do you like Kirk?”

She’d never talked about him, just about Ryan.

“I don’t know.” She opened her locker and began to put her books into her bag. “Maybe. I mean . . .” She paused, looking at him as he joked with Ryan. “After Ryan, he’s the hottest guy in school.”

She stared at him, really stared at him, and let out a sigh. “What am I doing? He made out with the Bellini twins last night. He’d never be interested in me.”

I frowned as I really looked at Cora.

She was a little smaller than me. Her brown hair was pulled back into a messy bun with some fraying ends framing her face. Aqua eyes. A fair complexion under a smattering of freckles. She wasn’t beautiful in the heavy-makeup kind of way. She was pretty in a natural way.

She was kind, shy, and loyal. I never heard her say anything negative about her friends. The only person she’d been negative about was Erin, but that made sense. She was terrified of the girl.

There was no reason Kirk wouldn’t want to be with her.

“He’d be nuts not to want you,” I told her.

She fixed me with a dark look. “Come on.”

“I’m serious. I mean, I’m taking inventory. If he doesn’t want to date you, the only reason would be because he wants to keep fooling around with people who aren’t girlfriend material. Sorry, Cora, but you’re dating material. And he was interested. He asked me what was different with you today.”

“What’d you say?” She was so still.

I leaned against her neighbor’s locker. “I told him I didn’t know, but you seemed sexier to me. He agreed.”

Her mouth almost fell open and color splashed across her cheeks. “He did?”

“Yeah. He did.”

She ducked her head again, sneaking a look at him.

Ryan and Kirk were both watching us.

Kirk was staring at Cora like he’d never seen her before. Ryan watched me with the same expression. It took me a second to place it, because it was different. His eyes were locked on me, his mystified expression from before mixing with a look of approval. Then it hit me, and I almost fell back against the locker behind me.

I was the old me.

This was something I would’ve done.

I would’ve helped a friend who needed a pep talk. There might’ve been a guy I helped steer in the right direction, and I would’ve been at that friend’s locker talking to her about the guy. This was the real me. It felt good. I mean, it felt weird, but it felt right.

Ryan was seeing this side of me for the first time.

I pulled my gaze away and glanced down.

Willow was with me. I felt her, and I waited, expecting her to say something. She didn’t. She remained quiet, and I couldn’t help myself.

Really? I shot at her. You don’t say anything this time? And like she was really standing there, I heard a huff right before she turned and walked away.

She left me. I was struck speechless a second.

“You okay?”

Cora had shut her locker and had her bag over one shoulder. She