How To Wife Your Nanny A Billionaire Single Dad Romantic Comedy- Melinda Minx Page 0,20

to let me forget that.”

“Dramamine.”

“It only helps a little.”

Silas rolled his eyes at me. “Sack up, bro. These few authors make up nearly 20% of our total revenue. These are the big fish, and I need my wingman to hunt them down.”

“Your analogies are shit. If they are fish, then why are we hunting them? You catch a fish, and you don’t need a wingman to go fishing.”

He put a hand on my shoulder. “Red Sun Press is sitting there on a little dinky fishing boat. They have their sad little fishing poles in the water. They’re waiting patiently for our authors to bite. Whooooooosh!” He mimicked a plane with his hand. “Now the two of us fly in. We’re in state-of-the-art fighter jets. We have so many missiles and bombs on these fucking planes that we can barely stay airborne. We blow the absolute shit out of their fishing boat, and we evaporate the entire lake, killing every last fish.”

“So we’re going to murder our authors? Great metaphor. Look, I’ll go. I’m not going to like it, but I’ll suck it up. Carla can’t go on the cruise though. She is leaving in three days, and the cruise is in a week.”

“So get your new little toy.”

“I did,” I said, but then I realized I should definitely correct his phrasing. “She is not my toy. I’ve got a legitimate, by-the-book contract with her. She’s my nanny. Naomi’s nanny. And she’s going to publish some more books for us.”

Silas rolled his eyes at me. “What are those books going to make us? Like $10,000 each?”

“Naomi loves those books. I’m going to market the shit out of them. I believe in them. We didn’t push them hard enough before. I didn’t know what we had.”

“Are they going to make us…” he looked at me and grinned. “Two million bucks?”

Fuck. Silas was like a fucking spider. How did he have time to figure all this shit out. He gave off the impression that he was always so busy sleeping and fucking around that he couldn’t possibly have time to have his finger so hard on the pulse of every single contract that went through the office, and yet here we were.

“It’s complicated,” I said.

“You really should have accepted my help, man. I know that a million isn’t much for us, but it’s the principle. Paying for sex? Come on, that’s just pathetic.”

“I’m not paying for sex. I’m not going to have sex with her. I just needed a nanny, and I’m willing to pay top-dollar to a nanny that I trust with Naomi.”

He laughed. “A million-dollar nanny!”

“Naomi likes her. That’s worth it to me.”

“Keep telling yourself that’s why. You’re loaded, but you’re the cheapest rich guy I’ve ever met. You still order off the dollar menu when we make those late-night McDonald’s runs.”

“They’ve split it into three menus now. I order mostly off the $2 and $3 menu.”

“You’ve got yourself a real problem now though.”

“How’s that?”

“I’m not going to argue with you about whether or not you want to sleep with her. I know you want to sleep with her. I’ll spare you the indignity of making you admit that.”

I had already crossed my arms, but I kept the tightest poker face as I listened to Silas speak what I would only admit to myself as the complete truth.

He leaned back against my desk. “I know you didn’t offer her a million dollars. That must have been her.”

“I’m pretty sure she was just joking. Throwing out a crazy number as a way of telling me to fuck off.”

He cocked his head and smiled. “Funny, and yet you turned it into a real offer. And she took it. So she’s not a gold digger, because you basically blew the entire mountain up with dynamite and threw all the gold right onto her lap. So now, if you sleep with her…”

I bit my lip. I was tempted to tell him that I didn’t want to sleep with her, but I knew it was a futile argument. I could win an argument with a toddler having a tantrum before I could win an argument with Silas about how I should handle my sex life.

Silas smiled. “So now if you sleep with her, she becomes a very expensive whore—”

Without thinking, I shoved him. It would have worked a lot better if he had been leaning against the wall rather than my own desk. I could have shoved him hard into the wall and grabbed his neck