and fun to just plain mean. There were dozens of times in college I would have to wrap my arms around her waist and carry her out of a college bar because she was ready to start a fight that I would have to finish.
“You’re the mean one,” Miranda said. “Everyone here says so. You’re not here, Liam. You’re supposed to be here.”
“Miranda…”
“So I’m going to smoke and drink and you can’t stop me,” she said. “And you know what? What would happen if I met a nice guy too? Huh? What would you do?”
Now she was really pushing at me.
She wanted me to get mad. She wanted me to explode with anger.
That would help lay the path of her justification of whatever she wanted to do.
I felt that burning in the pit of my stomach. Anger. But it was just that. Anger.
It wasn’t jealousy at all.
“Just tell me you’re safe,” I said. “Then we can talk in the morning when you’re sober.”
“Oh, I’m safe,” she said. “I’m right where I want to be, Liam.”
“Why did you call me tonight?”
“To make sure you remembered my voice. You’re a stranger to me. I’m a stranger to you. So what the fuck are we doing here? Why don’t I just give you this ring back and we can shake hands?”
I shut my eyes.
I clenched my jaw.
Full disclosure - it wasn’t the first time she had said that to me.
“Goodnight, Miranda,” I said. “You need to call me in the morning.”
“Goodnight,” Miranda said. “I’m going to fucking party.”
She hung up on me.
I looked around the apartment.
I glanced down at my phone.
All I wanted to do was text Emily.
Instead, I went to bed.
I sat behind my desk after kicking the interns out.
I hated that David was going to be the successful one in the group.
Marie was second up. She was smart but too timid. She second guessed herself way too much. And Jacob was lost in love land.
I spun around in my chair and put my hands behind my head.
The skyline of the city was as cliché as ever, but it was also comforting.
I didn’t sleep well last night.
My mind and heart were ripped into two pieces.
It wasn’t a simple decision here either. It wasn’t a decision that touched on only our two lives. The situation was so twisted up…
What am I supposed to do? Leave Miranda for Emily? Does Emily even want that? Then Emily’s business is basically done for. Then I’ll have to be the guy that buys out Miranda on the lease Emily signed and then help her relocate and start over. But Emily doesn’t want that. I know that for sure. She doesn’t want anyone to take care of her like that. She’s too damn stubborn for that…
My cell vibrated against the desk under a folder and notebook.
I dug my phone out and saw Miranda’s name again.
I sighed but knew I had to talk to her.
“Should I keep my voice low?” I whispered.
“Very funny,” she said.
“How’s the head?”
“Not as bad as my lungs,” Miranda said. “I remember why I quit smoking.”
“So it wasn’t my fault?”
“Really? You want to get into it?”
“You said some nasty things to me.”
“I was drunk,” she said.
“How much of it was true?”
She went silent.
I nodded.
“Why didn’t you come up here?” Miranda asked.
“What?”
“You didn’t come up here.”
“I thought we settled this…”
“No. We didn’t. You should have dropped everything and came with me. And after last night? You heard me. You could tell I was drunk and in pain. And you did nothing.”
“Did you call to apologize or pick another fight?” I asked.
“I called for the truth.”
“The truth?” I stood up. “Okay, Miranda. The truth… I have no idea what we’re doing here anymore. You’re not going to demand that I quit my job and move. I’m not leaving the city. I don’t care what job you get. If Boston is your place, then just stay. Find your dream job and your happiness there.”
“Which means… that’s it?” she asked.
“What do you want me to say? This isn’t working. I’m the only one who gave half a damn about the wedding. I thought we were both getting married. Instead, I’m the one getting married. It feels open ended if you ask me.”
“Wow,” Miranda said. “You knew I was going to be busy.”
“So then call it what it is,” I said. “We’re two different people now.”
“Then I’ll just drop the ring in an envelope, Liam,” Miranda said. “Which is what I was going to do anyway.”
“Yeah?”
“Of course. What is this?