to the suite and things got a little heated. I’d love to say something particularly sexy occurred, but basically I sniffed him, panted some, and then fell off a stool.”
She laughed, but only a second, before giving me a sympathetic look.
“He’s so soft, Alba.” I shook my head, feeling stupid. “He’s easygoing, and thinks all the way off-the-wall shit my family does is hilarious.” I smiled, remembering how wistful he was after my parents called me while I was in his car. “You know how Matt always needed to ‘mentally prepare’ for my family.”
This elicited teeth sucking and a middle finger I assumed was being proffered to Matt, wherever he was.
“I mean I would never feel embarrassed about my family. You know that. And I didn’t really let him get away with being an asshole to them, but now that I think about it, now that I’m here, I realize that I was a less me version of myself when I was with him. Like Julia but with the DR/PR thing on the lowest setting.”
Alba’s face was thunderous. “Every time we talk about that fuck face I wish you would’ve let me twist his balls in college that time he got drunk and threw my phone in a pool. Comemierda.”
“Your hate for him truly knows no bounds.” I blew her a kiss because I knew Alba would hide a body for me and I’d do the same for her. “Honestly though, one of the best things about being here is that I don’t have to be anything other than what comes naturally to me. It’s like now that I’m not around my mom or dad, and Matt’s not being an asshole, I can just be me for the sake of me. And this me wants to do the most when it comes to repping my culture.” I shrugged, not even sure of what I was trying to say. “I don’t know, I feel free and I like it. I like that Rocco really digs this version of me, because I like her a lot too. It took leaving home to find her, but this Julia’s here to stay.”
“Babe, I’ve always loved all the versions of you, and I am so glad the one you’re becoming in Dallas fits you. As for Rocco, let it take its course and see what happens.”
“Alba, Rocco doesn’t even live here. He’s going back to New York as soon as the project is done.” I put a hand up, as if to stop myself from even considering Rocco and I could go anywhere. “And please don’t forget that the last time I let my life plans get hijacked by a man, I got dragged out here.” I slumped, looking away from the screen.
“Don’t do that, Juli.” I smiled at her use of my nickname. “Matt was a fuckboi from day one, yes, but you can’t feel bad about that. You loved him and you tried hard to make that relationship work. You believed in what you had with him. Hon, don’t hate yourself for believing in someone you loved.”
I closed my eyes and nodded. “I just feel like I’m exactly the same person I was in high school, same hang-ups, same drama. Hell, until a couple of months ago, I even had the same boyfriend.”
Alba shook her head again. “Yes, you are the same person, and that person’s always been amazing. You and Matt had a lot of ups and downs, time apart, time together, and you fought for that relationship. It didn’t work out, but that doesn’t mean you can’t trust yourself or that you’re stuck.”
I wanted to believe her, but this whole situation had me wanting to mope and feel sorry for my clueless self. “I guess, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that I should not be trying to date Rocco.”
Alba didn’t look too happy with my conclusion, but she acquiesced. “No one said ‘date,’ but if being with the guy feels right, get you some.”
I was about to backpedal and deny some more when my phone buzzed and I saw it was a call from Rocco. Butterflies all over, goose bumps. Shivers. Yeah, I totally had this handled.
“Albita, uh, looks like Rocco’s calling me.”
More finger snapping. “Oooh, friend. He wants something with you.”
“Bye!”
I picked up the call and my hands were shaking a little. “Hey.”
“Julia.” Why did he have to say my name like that? I wasn’t the answer to any boy’s prayers. “I know you’ve been busy this