my life.
5
SAIGE
I stare down at my phone, rereading the same text message for the millionth time in the last two days. It's as if I'm waiting for it to change. Disappear even. But it doesn't. It just stays there, taunting me in the worst way.
“I'm surprised you don't have that memorized by now,” Maddie says, reading over my shoulder.
I sigh and toss the phone down in my lap. “I do.”
She plops herself next to me. “I don't know what you're so stressed about. That whole altercation could have gone a lot worse. Honestly, I'm surprised he was so mature about it.”
“What part about yelling at me until Brenna came downstairs do you consider mature?”
“The part where he didn't threaten to take you to court to see his child.”
Okay, maybe she has a point, but I can't get over everything that happened. The pain I felt when he vanished from my life is still fresh, despite six years passing. He walked out the door without even saying goodbye, and lived his best life. I can't even explain how much it killed me to see his smile all over the magazines while I agonized over every day that followed.
I was pregnant at nineteen years old and had bigger choices to make than I was ready for. Thankfully, after getting past the initial shock of their precious daughter having a baby out of wedlock, my parents were overwhelmingly supportive. But while Colby was out living the dream, I was dropping out of college to raise our daughter.
I lean into her, resting my head on her shoulder. “What if he gets a better opportunity again? What if he leaves her the same way he left me?”
“Do you really think he would do that?”
“No,” I answer honestly. “But I also never thought he would do what he did to me. And last night, he was pissed.”
Maddie chuckles. “Well, can you blame him? He found out he has a child, and not just like ‘Surprise, you have a baby!’ He found out he has a five-year-old.”
“I just want to keep her from getting hurt.”
She wraps her arms around me. “I know you do, S, but you can't exactly tell him no. It would be one thing if he had walked out on you, knowing you were pregnant, but he had no idea. There's no telling what he would have done if he had known. The one thing I'm sure of is that his anger the other night shows he cares, and that should count for something.”
That’s the thing I love about my best friend—despite her feelings about someone, and she has awfully hateful ones toward Colby Hendrix—she's always honest. Even if it's not what I want to hear. Even if it scares me. Even if it kills her to say it.
I PULL UP TO the house, hearing my GPS tell me that I've reached my destination. Honestly, it's a little surprising. I expected there to be a gate with some kind of security, but there isn't. It looks like an average house for this part of town—maybe a little bigger than most, but there isn't anything about it that screams NFL superstar.
As I get out of the car, I start to wonder if maybe I should have called first. Or at least texted to let him know I was coming. I didn't, because I wanted the opportunity to turn around and chicken out, but every time I considered it, Maddie's voice popped back into my head. She's right. He's done nothing to Brenna and as much as I want to protect her—he's her dad.
My heart pounds inside my chest the second my hand reaches the front door. Do I knock? Ring the bell? I don't know what to do. Back in college, our time together felt almost effortless, but those days are so long gone. He’s practically a stranger.
Just as I'm trying to talk myself into knocking, the door opens. Colby is coming out with a blonde, laughing together, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Fuck, I really should've called first.
After all the time I've seen articles about him and the plethora of women he's been with, I should be used to this. However, seeing it in person is something completely different. It stings, worse than it did after he was seen making out with some supermodel at a party while I was giving birth to our child.
His girlfriend sees me first and she stops short, causing Colby to walk straight into her back. He chuckles