to be a good way to focus on my future, I thought making my plans all the more real would help me accept my fate.
But it only made me miss him more because every time I found something I thought he’d like—a built-in ice maker, a trendy bar down the street—I realized I wouldn’t be able to tell him about it and that he’d never be able to see these places; not in screenshots, not in real life.
It’s funny how life surprises you sometimes. Never in a million years did I think I’d have agreed to a date with Talon. Never in a billion years did I think I’d fall in love with him.
He wasn’t who I thought he was.
He was so much more …
Pushing my thoughts aside, I keep searching for the perfect place to call home.
The rental market in Malibu is slim pickings and rent is astronomical. Most of the places that claim they have ocean views only boast the kind of ocean views you find when standing on your tiptoes, leaning over your tiny balcony railing.
But I’d take that over Iron Cross, Missouri a million times over.
Kira said I could borrow some furniture from her stock until I’m able to get some things of my own. Her only caveat was that I professionally style everything—which is a given—so she can have her photographer snap pictures for her social media.
The campanile chimes twelve times.
I should probably catch the bus back to Aunt Bette’s.
My stomach swirls, anxious at the thought of asking her if Talon stopped by today. Part of me hopes he did, the other part hopes he didn’t.
With my bag in tow, I trek to the nearest bus stop and wait for the blue line bus.
If I’m going to get through these next two months, I need to toughen up and stop feeling sorry for myself. It’s not the first time I’ve been floating on a breeze only to have life knock me down … and it won’t be the last.
Life has always, always been consistent like that.
I should be used to it by now.
Chapter 44
Talon
I return home expecting to walk into a quiet, empty apartment, only to find my living room couch occupied by three of the last people I want to see right now.
“Get out,” I say to Mark, Ira, and my mother.
They exchange looks, none of them trying to move. On the coffee table in front of them is a stack of white papers with Richmond’s logo along the masthead.
“What is this, a fucking contract intervention?” I ask.
“Sweetheart, we’re only trying to help.” Mom is the first to break their silence. She stands, gingerly making her way across the room to where I stand, but when she gets here, she keeps a careful distance, like she’s dealing with some kind of unstable basket case.
And maybe they are.
They took the one thing I loved, the first thing I ever truly loved, and ripped her out of my life without warning.
“All of your dreams are about to come true, Talon,” Mom says. “All you have to do is sign.”
I think about what Irie said last weekend, that I loved the game once, I can love it again. Deep down I know she’s right. I could sign the contract, I could love the game again. But standing here, in front of three people who couldn’t give a shit less about what I love and what I want, makes the idea of giving in a bitter pill to swallow.
“Don’t you mean all of Mark’s dreams?” I shoot him a look. Funny how quiet he’s being. I imagine the little bombshell I dropped on him earlier this week has got him feeling tongue-tied today. “Fuck football. And fuck you, Mark.”
“Talon.” Mom gasps, her hand splaying over her chest. “I don’t understand what’s going on. It’s like ever since you met that girl, you’ve become a different person.”
“Don’t put this on her.” My words slice through the small apartment. “Leave her out of this.”
“We get that you loved her,” she says.
“Love,” I correct her. “I love her.”
“Honey, I know you’re hurting right now and break ups are never easy, but—”
I knew it.
I fucking knew it.
“What did you say to her?” I ask. “Huh? What’d you say to get her to leave me?”
She turns back to Mark, who gives a subtle shake of his head. I’m sure whatever she said, whatever she did, Mark was the puppet master behind it all.
“What. Did. You. Do?” I ask again, teeth gritted.
“Talon …” Mom