when to stop; she’d push my buttons until I lost it and had to leave. She didn’t like that I would leave, and she’d start another fight once I was back home. She loved to spend my money, but most of all, she couldn’t handle being alone. It usually led to her sleeping with the cable guy or pool guy. I wish I were kidding, but I’m not. While I wish I would have found anyone else other than her to love and be loved by, I know if I hadn’t met Lilly, I wouldn’t have my daughter.
Oh, my gorgeous Celeste.
I’ve done a lot of things in my life, some good and some bad, but Celeste, she’s the best damn thing I have accomplished. I may want the Cup, and it may suck that I don’t have it, but at the end of the day, I get to be Celeste’s daddy, and nothing compares to that. Which reminds me, Lilly should be on her way with her. I glance at the clock above my stove as I put away the formula and baby food I got in preparation for my week. Since it’s summer, the parenting plan says we alternate weeks of care for Celeste. I wish I could have her all the time, every single day, but that would mean I would have to have Lilly. And I’d be damned before I let her in my life again.
I almost got away from her, but she came back pregnant with Celeste. I gave it my best shot the second time, but nope, like always, she couldn’t seem to keep her legs closed. It may make me a dick, but I had a paternity test done to make sure Celeste was mine. Thankfully, she is, because when she was born, I fell in love with her. My sweet princess.
I move through the kitchen getting things ready, which was what I was doing before I started daydreaming about not having the Stanley Cup. I really need to stop doing that. It is what it is. I don’t have it—move on, work harder. All I can do is stay in shape this summer and soak up as much time with Celeste as I can get. When the season starts, it’s going to be hard, but we’ll manage. We’ve been doing it for six months, and I don’t doubt we’ll continue the same. I may greatly dislike Lilly, but I force myself to outwardly respect her for Celeste’s sake.
Lilly doesn’t do the same for me, though.
She treats me like crap, guilts me when Celeste isn’t with me and I’m playing hockey. I asked her not to bring a man around my child until she’s dated him more than a month, but she ignores that wish at every opportunity. Could be because the average length of a relationship for her is a week, but still. It drives me crazy she won’t honor that one request. I guess I shouldn’t expect much since I asked her not to cheat on me too, and she still did that. The guy she’s with now, though, Marc, has been around for a month, so here’s to hoping he locks her down. Not because I want Lilly happy, but because I want stability for Celeste.
I don’t understand Lilly, to be honest. She doesn’t seem to care about what is best for Celeste. Only herself. It makes no sense since she comes from a solid upbringing, good parents, and a great family. Meanwhile, I raised myself, and I’m out-parenting her, tenfold. Pretty sure her parents feel sorry for me, for Celeste, but no one corrects her behavior. Except me. I don’t give a shit. Treat my child right, or I’m calling you out and fixing the situation. She could be a good mom—if she wanted to. She doesn’t want to, and that annoys me.
Really, everything annoys me lately.
I move through my house, picking up and cleaning up so that the house is ready for Celeste. I bought a nice home on the beach right when we found out Lilly was pregnant. My teammate and buddy, Chandler, and his family live on the other side of the beach in a smaller neighborhood, but word is, his wife is pregnant again and now he’s looking over here by me. It would be nice to have a friend close since I live between two older couples. They’re wonderful people, but they sure do love being in my business. They really don’t like Lilly, but