only had two.
I wanted him. Sweet baby Jesus, I wanted this man. He knew what to do with me. I could tell. He would tune me and play me like his damn guitar. God, every inch of him was toned and solid. He was so strong and he smelled so good.
“I’m on the pill, okay?” I breathed. “For my periods.”
“I got tested last month. I’m clean. And Kristen gave me a condom. So did Josh.”
I laughed and it was drowned by his lips back on mine.
This was real. This was happening.
My breathing was ragged when I reached for the top of his pants and his breath hitched as I tugged at his belt. Then something in the familiar metallic clink of the buckle whipped me instantly back into the room.
Brandon. The last time I did this was with Brandon.
I sobered in a heartbeat. All the passion bled right out of me. I fell back onto the cushions, limp. “Jason, I can’t.”
His hands stilled immediately. All twelve of them.
“I’m not ready. I’m sorry,” I whispered.
He hovered over me and put his forehead to mine and closed his eyes, catching his breath. His chest pressed into my bare breasts and I could feel exactly how much he wanted me, digging into my leg.
God, I felt awful. I should never have let him inside. The porch was safe. Bright as hell, but safe. The porch didn’t come with expectations.
With possibilities.
He breathed against me for a minute, and I felt him cooling down.
“I just need more time. It’s too soon.” I bit my lip. “Don’t be mad at me.”
He opened one eye and looked at me gently. “I’m not mad. I could never be mad at you for that. Look at me.” He held my eyes. “I get it. And I want you to be ready. You’re not doing either of us a favor if you rush things. Okay?”
It was so earnest it made my heart melt. “Okay.”
He smiled softly at me and kissed my forehead. Then he reached up and grabbed a throw blanket and pulled it over me, tucking it under my arms, and got up and put on his shirt.
I sat up on the sofa and clutched the blanket to my chest and I watched him as he went to let Tucker out of the laundry room. The dog bounded over to me and jumped into my lap, licking me.
Jason leaned down with a hand on the top of the sofa and kissed me. “I’ll pick you up for the airport at five thirty. Get some sleep.” He smiled at me.
“Thank you for understanding.”
He shook his head. “You’re worth the wait. You’re worth everything.” He winked and let himself out, and Tucker followed him, close on his heels.
Chapter 19
Jason
? Misery Business | Paramore
Time to move. Lola Simone was sitting on the step of my trailer.
I slammed the door to my truck. “What the hell are you doing here?”
Tucker let out a low growl next to me.
She sat on the metal stair, lit by the lights of the pool, with her back against my door, smoking a joint. She wore a tiny silver dress and she spread her legs in answer to my question, balancing on the heels of her stilettos. She wasn’t wearing panties.
“Oh, Jesus, come on,” I said, looking away from her. “Enough of this shit, Lola. Get up.” I looked back at her.
She didn’t budge.
“Lola, now. Leave.”
“Already? I just got here.” She grinned up at me, her eyelids heavy. “Talk about a quickie,” she muttered.
“Who the fuck gave you this address? I don’t want you here. I’m done. Move or I’ll move you myself.”
Her eyes glinted and she shook her head.
Hot anger built inside me. I was so fucking sick of this. Sick of it.
I’d been more than patient up to this point. I’d been a damn saint while she harassed me for months on end and dragged my reputation and my privacy through the music charts—but this was something else. Now I had to consider Sloan.
What if she had come home with me? Or shown up like she did last night? How would I even explain this shit? We were too new for this.
And what would Lola have done if Sloan had been here…
My jaw clenched. “I want you out of here. Let’s go.” I took her by the elbow and pulled her to her feet. I just wanted to get her out of my way so I could go inside, but I could feel the wobble of