“Maybe?” I corrected more calmly. “But he would never... I would never...” Ugh. “We have too much bad blood between us.” At least, that was how it seemed right now. If fate had other plans for Cinder and her prince, as I hoped, I was willing to sacrifice my animosity. Because I was kind. “But, um, what if I did want him for myself?” How would she react?
To my shock, she replied, “I’d ask the king to allow Saxon to choose between us.”
Had I detected a note of smugness? Did she think no one in their right mind would choose me if she was an option? Was she evil, after all?
Or maybe I’d heard what I’d expected to hear, due to past experience.
I closed my eyes for a moment and nodded. Yes. I’d let the rejection of others color my perception of the moment. Dior was being genuinely kind to me, and I was being petty. Even now she watched me with hope and eagerness, as if she feared her response wasn’t good enough. And really, I wanted Saxon happy. He deserved to live the life Leonora had denied him.
And maybe I did, too? I would forever feel guilt for what happened to my mother, but in the bright light of day, I couldn’t blame myself as ferociously as before. I’d been a child, ignorant of what was happening to me. I’d had no real defenses other than the barrier, and it had failed me.
I shouldn’t have to carry guilt for my mother’s death. Leonora was to blame.
If Saxon knew the truth about my possession, he might kill me to kill the phantom. Would she die with me, though, or would she live on?
I didn’t want her free, able to hurt others. I didn’t want her suppressed, just biding her time; I wanted her dead. She’d told me I couldn’t survive without her. But the evil stepmother couldn’t be trusted. She never had Cinder’s well-being in mind.
The crowd gave a collective gasp, and I whipped my attention to the fight. The vampire had clawed the fae’s chest directly over his heart. The fae had a weapon, too. A dagger. But like Saxon, he hadn’t used it. Hadn’t even unsheathed it. Why, why, why? There was no reason good enough.
Saxon shot up, up into the air, his fingers tangled in the gorgon’s hair. The gorgon flailed beneath him, but the avian showed no mercy, drawing back his arm and flinging the other male at the troll, sending the two flying away from the fae.
Before Saxon could descend, the giant latched on to his wing and yanked. A pop reverberated, and I flinched, the crowd giving another collective gasp. Saxon collapsed, but he rebounded swiftly, flying around and around the giant’s feet, twisting his shoestrings together. Then he pushed, wrenching the beast off his feet.
When the giant hit the ground, the entire coliseum shook. Dust plumed the air, rock scraping against rock. Heart racing, I clutched the arms of my throne and tilted forward, closer to the action. Saxon hovered near the giant, preparing to strike. How slowly he moved now. I looked him over, noticing the odd angle of the injured wing, and groaned. The pain he must be suffering. And the pixies hadn’t even dropped their bombs yet.
The avian descended, thrusting his sword down...
With a roar, the giant swung a beefy arm. He nailed Saxon in the head, flinging him a good length across the field.
I jumped to my feet. My avian landed in the dirt with a hard thump. One second passed, two, three, but he didn’t get up. He didn’t even move.
Concern for him propelled me from the dais. I pushed through the crowd, my heart knocking against my ribs. I didn’t care about any physical discomfort. I had other worries, Leonora attempting to wrest control from me, wanting to be the one to save Saxon. I fought back.
Get to Saxon. Just get to Saxon.
“Ashleigh? What are you doing?” Dior called. From the ensuing rustle, I suspected she had jumped to her feet and given chase. “You shouldn’t leave without a guard. The king told me it isn’t safe.”
I’d attended the party without a problem. I wouldn’t be attacked now. I didn’t slow. Leonora continued to claw at our barrier, her frenzy feeding mine. Must get to Saxon.
The tips of my fingers burned, a desire to torch everyone in my path consuming me. Her desire. She’s winning? “If you care for him so much, why have you harmed