he said. His voice was low. She shouldn’t have heard him over the running taps, and yet the deep rumble seemed to vibrate in her belly.
And between her legs.
“I’m not sure what you mean,” she said, turning off the stream of water.
“Really?” There was something in his voice that might’ve been humour if it hadn’t been so heavy. “The day we met, you looked at me like you’d never seen a man before.”
Because I’d never seen a man like you. “That was shock, actually. You know, because I fell.” She was impressed with the steadiness of her own voice. Her own lying voice.
“And Saturday?”
Ruth swallowed. “I don’t know why you’re fishing for compliments. You must know that, objectively speaking, you’re very attractive.”
She heard the scrape of chair legs against lino, heard his familiar tread as he crossed the narrow space. “Maybe. But I’m trying to figure out your opinion on the matter.”
She knew, somehow, that he would touch her.
When he did, it was better than she’d expected.
His chest pressed firmly against her back, the heat of his body surrounding her. He put his hands against the counter in front of them, bracketing Ruth with hard, warm muscle. “You see,” he said, his tone conversational, “sometimes I think I can read you. Then something happens, and I realise I can’t. Not completely. Not yet.”
Ruth shivered.
He leaned in even closer, bending down until his mouth brushed her ear. “So why don’t you tell me, Ruth? Tell me what’s going on inside your head.”
She couldn’t speak. She also couldn’t help herself. Ruth raised a hand, reached back until her fingers slid into his hair, felt the curve of his skull, pulled him closer, and wondered what the fuck she was doing.
Then she let her head fall to the side, exposing the line of her neck. A moment later, she felt his breath whisper over the sensitive skin of her throat.
Ah. That’s what she was doing.
Oh, dear.
Evan kissed her neck, his mouth soft and hot and everything she’d ever needed. Ruth’s knees might have buckled if she hadn’t been ready, completely ready, to feel this level of ecstasy at his touch.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured. “I’m usually much better than this.” His hands came to rest on her hips, sliding under the hem of her pyjama top.
“Better?” she echoed faintly. His fingers traced circles over the sensitive skin of her belly, and she moaned. Heat flooded her pussy, zipping up to her nipples.
“Better at controlling myself.” His tongue slid over her pulse, and then, lightly, he bit. “I don’t know what I’m doing. We barely know each other.”
Ruth arched against him, pressure building deep inside her core. “You’ve never slept with someone you barely know?”
“No. I couldn’t sleep with you yet. It wouldn’t be gentlemanly.”
Of all those nonsensical words, yet was the one that caught her attention.
It had never occurred to her, while she was drooling over his unreasonable hotness, that he might somehow find her attractive. Why had that never occurred to her?
“They all think you’re ugly. But I know you’re beautiful, Ruth.”
She pushed the memory away. It wasn’t even hard. Not when one of Evan’s hands slid away from her hips, down toward the apex of her thighs. His palm flattened against her cotton-covered mound and he pushed her more firmly against him. The thick column of his erection pressed into her lower back.
“Jesus, Evan,” she breathed. At the feel of that insistent length, a pulse of energy rocketed to her clit. Her stomach tightened. She hadn’t felt like this in so long. She hadn’t deserved it. She wasn’t sure if she deserved it now.
He laughed, but it wasn’t a laugh she recognised. It was low and dark and sent a thrill up her spine. “Do you like this, love?” He pressed the heel of his palm against her clit, the pressure delicious even through her clothes. “Tell me.”
Ah.
Just like that, the blazing purity of pleasure drained away. The reality of who Ruth was—how Ruth was—crushed her the way pianos crush cartoon characters: she was still breathing, somehow, but she shouldn’t have been.
Ruth absolutely could not tell him anything. Anything at all.
Swallowing down her sudden panic, she said, “We should stop.”
In a breath, he went from surrounding her to disappearing. She felt suddenly cold, suddenly alone, without his arms around her.
But that, she reminded herself, was the safest way to feel.
“Are you okay?” Evan asked softly.
Hesitant, she turned to face him. His cheeks were flushed, his eyes heavy-lidded, his lips parted. Beautiful. Still,