My dad runs a hand down his face.
“I can seduce anyone I want.” I’ve only ever tried with Joe and it looks to be working.
“Kayla.” I look up at Joe, not used to him saying my name. More so in that tone.
“I told you to zip it.”
“Stop talking about seducing anyone you want.”
“I can.” I motion to my skirt and he closes his eyes, shaking his head, but I swear for a moment he fights a smile.
“So I guess she’s your handful now,” Dad says with a chuckle, and I realize he’s not really looking angry.
“I’m not a handful.” Dad’s eyebrows lift all the way up his forehead. “Okay, sometimes I’m a handful.” I am a little bit of a mess, but things are always breaking and happening around me. At first I thought it was bad luck or I would blame it on something else, but I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m the common denominator so it has to be me.
“She stole the coffee machine from the station.”
“You don’t have proof!”
“There are cameras everywhere in the station,” he reminds me.
Damn it. How did I forget about that? Hopefully Missy doesn't have cameras at the back of her place.
“Oh,” is all I can think to say while Joe’s body shakes with laughter. My dad’s lips twitch into a smile and this isn't going as I expected. “So what are you doing around these parts?” I change the subject.
“Missy called about something and then we heard a commotion in here. Thought someone broke in again, as the shop is closed right now.”
“What did Missy want?” Joe asks. I throw my elbow back as forcefully as I can but I only meet a hard stomach.
“Ouch.” I rub my elbow. Why is he asking about her? It’s me he had pinned to the table minutes ago.
“Why are you hitting me?” Now he’s as amused as my dad seems to be.
“It was an accident, Officer,” I tell my dad. My rap sheet is growing by the second.
“It’s Dad,” he corrects dryly, rolling his eyes.
“Well, what did the snitch want?” I turn my nose up because Missy is a snitch and she called the cops on me.
“To get us over here so she can ask if we’ve made an arrest.” Ha, she’s got jokes.
My dad wasn't going to arrest me; at least I don’t think he would. He did put me in a cell once for five minutes when I was eight as a time out. I was supposed to be in for ten but he said I was enjoying it too much.
“No proof,” Joe supplies for me, and I nod in agreement. I’m glad he’s on my side as he should be. Whatever he and Missy had before is in the past, but it better be long past. I’d hate to burn down her shop, because I don’t know if Dad could get me out of that one.
“You found her, now arrest her. I don’t know why you ever let her free to begin with.” Missy pops into the back of the store like she was invited.
“Because I didn't do anything,” I lie. “Don’t be mad at me because someone caught you on camera lying about your baked goods and picking your wedgies.” Joe’s body shakes harder with laughter this time and I elbow him again. “And you, stop asking about Missy.”
“You've been asking about me, Joe? I heard you were back in town.” She gives him the sweetest smile I’ve ever seen in my life. That’s it.
I lunge for her, but Joe’s hold on me tightens and I don’t move.
“Let me at her. I’ll do the time for this one.” I try to get free, but Joe lifts me off my feet.
“She’s trying to assault me.” Missy buries her face in her hands and pretends to cry. My eyes roll so hard I swear they almost come out of my head.
“Missy, go back to your shop before I arrest you for the stolen internet.” Missy gasps at my dad but doesn't deny it. She huffs one last time before stomping off.
Clarence and Jefferson don’t move from where they’re leaning up against the patrol car. You’d think they didn't notice anything going on but I bet you gossip will spread. It always does.
“People are stealing internet and picking wedgies. You’re letting crime run rampant around here.” Clarence chuckles before taking a sip of his coffee. I think they all might be used to my outbursts.
“You stole our coffee machine, so now