now a Valentine's baby."
"She's going for all the major holidays," Lauren quipped.
"If you don't sit down right now, I will pick you up and put you in that chair," Will said.
Before Shannon could counter her husband's ultimatum, Shay Zucconi and Audrey Saunders gathered at the opposite end of the table, Jaime, Emme, and Grace following.
"Has anyone heard from Tara?" Shay asked. She taught kindergarten and lived with the kind of deep-sprung optimism necessary for that work. "She's not here and she's not returning my texts."
Audrey gestured toward her phone. "Not returning my texts either. I'm getting really worried."
"She's all right," Lauren replied. "I heard from her this morning. She said something personal came up and she'd see us all on Monday."
"I'm still worried," Audrey said, surprising no one. She was always very worried about something. To cope with her anxiety, she baked. I hadn't realized it was stress-baking until I'd asked her about the volume of baked goods she produced at last year's holiday party. She'd confessed—with the help of some of Riley's strong cocktails—she found the precision and order of baking calming. That, and something about her ex-husband hating baked goods and revenge being good for her.
"Wait a second," Max said, glancing up from another poor structural decision. "You're telling me Tara and Drew both skipped out on us?"
"Jesus Christ, Shannon," Will muttered. He handed Annabelle to Nick, who was all too happy to collect that little pork chop. "Sit down, would you?"
"Are we sure they're both alive?" Grace called.
"Don't say things like that," Audrey cried, pressing a hand over her heart. I didn't know how she managed to stay chill with her fifth graders but I was told she was stellar in the classroom.
"It's a valid question," Emme responded, shrugging at Audrey's outrage. "Think about it. Drew and Tara driving to and from Albany together for that training a couple of weeks ago? The first mortal wound would hit before they crossed state lines."
"For fuck's sake, peanut," Will muttered as he dropped into the chair. He looped his arms around her waist and settled her on his lap. "The things you make me do."
"If you think you're complaining, you should do it more effectively," Shannon replied.
"They won't kill each other," Jaime said as she exchanged a meaningful look with Audrey. "But it could get real spicy."
"Mommy and Daddy do enjoy fighting," Max added.
"Jaime's right. They wouldn't kill each other," Shay argued with a laugh. "They have friendly disagreements."
But that wasn't a theory I'd support. As co-deans, Drew and Tara didn't share anything friendly—much in the way Shannon and Will weren't friendly. I'd suggested as much to Lauren on many occasions and each time, she insisted I was reading the situation wrong. We had a small bet on the table despite my wife's insistence they were merely rivals. Regardless, I had a reasonably good idea what they were doing today and I'd be collecting some bragging rights soon.
"I think we should check on them," Audrey said. "Just in case."
Grace glanced into Audrey's cup, asking, "What are you drinking? Whatever it is, it's not strong enough."
Riley bustled in with his winter coat still on and beanie askew, asking, "Are we going on another secret mission? Is that what I heard? A search and rescue?"
Lauren tossed up her hands, shaking her head at him. "Did you get lost? What-even time is it? You're lucky we didn't send out a search and rescue party for you."
My father-in-law poked his head into the conversation. "What's this about a mission?"
Alex pulled the hat off Riley's head, saying, "Sorry. My fault. We were walking out the door and the hospital paged me."
"I like how my husband's sleeping through this," Tiel said, shaking her head at Sam. "How the mighty party boys fall."
"You're not on call," Nick said to Alex.
"Yeah," Alex drawled. "I know. It was one of those special moments when it's a holiday and no one is answering pages, so they page the surgeon who lives across the street from the hospital."
"Is the mission at the hospital?" Riley asked. "We just came from there. Alex handled everything in need of handling."
"There's no mission," Lauren said, waving her father and Riley off. "No secret operation. No searching, no rescuing. I've heard from both Tara and Drew. They're all right. I can assure you both are alive." And definitely in bed together. "We'll see them Monday." When I win this bet once and for all.
"I'm going to text her one more time," Audrey said.
"You do that,"