to come to us, but we have to be open to receiving it. We have to know we deserve it, in order to give it a chance.”
“Simple as that?”
“Yeah,” I said. “It’s that simple and yet, sometimes that hard to do.”
He jerked his chin at my food. “Eat,” he said, a faint smile on his lips. “It’ll get cold.”
My appetite was gone. It was more important to make him see I knew what I wanted. To shout that I trusted him with every fiber of my being, and he could trust me. But James Whelan took nothing for himself, even when he deserved everything. Quite possibly, the idea of being loved was so foreign to him, he wouldn’t know it if it slapped him in the face.
Or if it were sitting right across from him.
We ate in silence, the air between us tight with possibilities. A humming live wire connected us. Its tension strained tighter and tighter, waiting for something to break it.
I watched Jimmy take a bite of his burger. A dollop of mustard stuck to the corner of his mouth.
Without hesitation, I crawled up onto the table, clattered over silverware, and nearly knocked over a water glass. Jimmy stared, his eyes wide to see me on my hands and knees on the tabletop, my face inches from his. His shock mellowed into want, a heat emanating from his skin.
“You have some mustard on your face,” I whispered. “Let me.”
I bent my head toward his and licked his lips in a long, slow swipe. My mouth lingered on his, wanting his kiss so badly. Hungrier for it than any food.
“Got it.” I climbed backward into my seat, vaguely mindful of other patrons watching and whispering. I sipped my cold shake, casual as hell on the outside while inwardly, I was on fire for him.
I’m yours, Jimmy, I thought. Come and get me.
Chapter 28
Jim
Thea on all fours, her necklace swinging between us and her breasts pushing out of her bra from under her shirt. Her tongue on my mouth.
This is going to get me arrested. I’m going to take her right here in the restaurant.
She climbed back into her seat, and I took a long pull of the cold soda when I really needed an icy shower to cool my blood.
It seemed so easy; to have her. To be with her. But having something this perfect and good didn’t happen to me. Like being dirt-poor for years and suddenly having a bucket of gold dumped in my lap. I didn’t know what to do with it all.
You’re going to fuck it up, is what you’re going to do, Doris offered.
I paid the bill while Thea used the restroom. I came out into the sticky heat to find she’d slipped past me and was now leaning against the truck.
“Only a few hours left to go,” I said. “Should be in Manhattan at dusk.”
“And then what?” she said. “I wish you would tell me what you’re thinking. After you kissed me yesterday morning, I thought…” She shook her head. “Never mind.”
She pushed herself off the driver’s door and walked around to her side.
I climbed in on my side and started the truck. I said nothing but let Thea be upset with me. Getting her to New York City was the priority. Everything else could wait.
Thea put her music back on, humming along or singing while I drove us across Pennsylvania. She napped for the last few hours and woke as the sun was sinking in a cloudy gray sky. We hit the Lincoln Tunnel and went north for ten blocks, to Midtown Manhattan in crawling traffic.
Thea craned out the windows, taking in the sights, her smile stunning in its happiness.
“Oh my God, there it is,” she said, jostling my arm and pointing. “The Empire State Building.”
“You want to go there now?”
“No, I’m going to save that for last.” She grinned. “It’s getting dark. I want to see Times Square.”
Of course, she does. All that light and color.
I found a parking spot a few blocks away. The air felt heavy with rain—a summer storm looming. We walked with the crowds of tourists in humidity that felt different from the green heat of the South. New York smelled like heated metal and concrete. Hot dogs and falafel. Garbage and perfume. Thea inhaled it with the same exhilaration she had on our walks on the Blue Ridge grounds.
We stood at the corner of Broadway and Seventh Avenue and I understood Thea’s need to be here.