storm, I’m destroyed little by little, and one day the storm will be so strong, it’ll leave nothing but destruction in its wake.
Lying in my bed—which is nothing more than a mattress on the ground with a single sheet and pillow—with a worn-out copy of my favorite romance novel open, I try to focus on the words, but I can’t. My hands are shaking and my heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest. It’s been quiet for too long.
I read the same line three more times and give up, closing the book. I remember when I begged for the book, saying I needed something to do down here in the quiet isolation. He forced me to earn that book in ways I can’t bring myself to think about. Now I can’t even concentrate long enough to finish reading a book I have read dozens of times. At first, I lived in fear, my brain conjuring up the worst-case scenarios. Now that I’ve lived them, it’s hard to switch my brain off.
The drugs help. I know I’ve become addicted to them, but when it’s the only way to shut your body down, the addiction doesn’t matter. Survival is all I know now.
I hear the front door slam shut and know he’s home, and by the way he’s stomping around there’s a good chance he’s pissed about something. I close my eyes and pray he won’t come down here. There’s nothing he can give me that’s worth the consequences of him coming down here.
His assistant, Derek, is the only person I need. He gives me the drugs I crave to calm my nerves. He’ll make my hands stop shaking, my heart stop thumping, and my body and mind shut off. Derek gives. Weston, on the other hand, takes. He takes and takes from me, and at this point, I feel like I have nothing left to give.
The door creaks open and a bright light shines through. I quickly cover my eyes, unable to recall the last time I saw light other than through the small slats in the windows that give off just enough natural light for me to read my book. My world, which used to be a bright canvas, has been stripped of all color. The heavy footsteps make each step creak as a shadow makes its way down. When I see it’s Weston, my heart plummets.
Take.
He’s here to take.
Not give.
“Spread your fucking legs.” He stalks toward me. Then roughly grabbing ahold of my ankles, he pulls my body toward the edge of the bed, my head hitting the cement wall then getting dragged down.
“I-I need something.” It’s stupid to beg for what I need, knowing he doesn’t care, but I’m desperate. He only drugs me to make me stop screaming, stop fighting him. He prefers me almost comatose so he can do whatever he wants to me.
“You need to shut your fucking mouth!” He backhands me so hard I almost blackout. “I can’t wait until you turn twenty-two so I can get rid of your fucking whore ass!” Twenty-two seems to be the magic number. For what? I have no clue, and while I have no clue how long I’ve been down here, I imagine I have at least another year or so until I turn twenty-two.
I close my eyes and wish for the drugs he refused to give me. If he would’ve given them to me, I would be somewhat numb during this horrific nightmare.
Take.
Take.
Take.
Even without the drugs, I’ve trained myself to escape my mind during his torture. For several long moments, I’m free.
Free from the pain. Free from the darkness. Free from him.
Smack!
My escape has been short-lived. With one hard slap, I’m right back with him.
Weston is done with me, though. The essence of his crimes against me are smeared against my inner thighs, a sticky reminder that I’ll never fully escape.
He grabs my face and turns me to face him. He smacks me again across my face and then walks back up the stairs. Once the door is shut, I go to the small bathroom that’s down here to rinse off. I use a small amount of soap, unsure if Weston will replace it once it’s all gone. I’ve had the same bottle of soap since he kidnapped me and locked me down here.
Once I’m done rinsing off, I dry my body with the one towel I have. I don’t have any clothes, so I can’t get dressed. I take a few