as he rubbed the back of his neck, unable to look Charlie in the eye as he glanced around the room, looking for something to do only to mumble an excuse and head back into the kitchen before they could say something else to make this worse.
“Fuck!” he bit out as he slammed the kitchen door shut behind him before he grabbed hold of the kitchen counter and released a humorless chuckle because this was beyond fucking perfect.
He’d been doing everything that he could think of to make sure that she didn’t know how badly he wanted her and now, because he didn’t add extra insulation to his bathroom walls when he bought the place, she knew just how fucking pathetic he really was.
“Are you going to the party?” came the softly spoken words that let him know that his humiliation wasn’t over yet.
“No,” Devin said evenly as his grip tightened around the counter.
There was a pause and then…
“Are you ever going to look at me again?”
“No,” he said, wondering how this night could possibly get any worse when her next words fucking destroyed him.
“How long?” Charlie asked after a slight hesitation.
“Five years,” Devin said, deciding that there was no point in pretending anymore.
“Were you ever going to tell me?” she asked, sounding hurt.
“Tell you what?” Devin demanded as his grip tightened around the counter to the point of pain. “What was I supposed to tell you? That I can’t stop thinking about you? That I’ve wanted you from the moment that I saw you? That I’m so fucking in love with you that it’s killing me? That it doesn’t matter because I can’t risk breaking my children’s hearts if this doesn’t work out? Is that what you wanted to hear?”
For a moment, she didn’t say anything and then…
“You really don’t know me if you think that I would ever do anything to hurt Dustin or Abbi. I love them and no matter what happens between you and me, that will never change,” she bit out evenly.
“I can’t risk it,” he said, feeling sick to his stomach as he forced the words out.
“And that’s why you’ve been avoiding me all week,” she said, sighing heavily.
“Yes,” he said, praying that she would just leave before he lost his fucking mind.
“I see,” she murmured, sounding thoughtful before adding, “I’m not playing this game with you, Devin.”
“It’s not a game,” he bit out angrily.
“What would you call it?”
“Keeping my promise,” he said evenly, wishing like hell that there was another way but he couldn’t risk it.
He couldn’t fucking risk it, Devin reminded himself as he squeezed his eyes shut and-
“Even if it means breaking my heart?” came the softly spoken words that had him opening his eyes and glancing over his shoulder in time to watch her walk away.
Chapter 23
“I’m having a great time, how about you?” Ben asked dryly as he dropped down in the booth across from her with a heavy sigh.
“The best,” Charlie said, matching his sigh with one of her own as she sat there, trying to figure out what she was doing here.
“Move in with me,” he said, making her frown as she glanced away from the dance floor filled to capacity with Bradford Creation employees, their dates, venders, and local customers that looked forward to this party all year and-
“Hey!” Ben snapped when she was forced to take his drink away, because clearly, he’d already had too much to drink if he thought that she was going to move in with him.
“You’re cut off,” Charlie said as she handed the bottle of beer to a passing waitress.
“I was still drinking that,” he grumbled as he watched the waitress walk away while Charlie sat there wondering if she should arrange for an intervention.
“And you’ve clearly had enough if you think I’m going to willingly move in with you again after what you put me through in college,” she said with a pitying shake of her head as she watched his eyes narrow dangerously on her.
“I thought we’d agreed never to speak of that,” he bit out.
“Then don’t ask me to move in with you knowing how it will end,” Charlie said, reaching for her drink only to have Ben get to it first.
“We were kids,” he pointed out.
“And we were both Googling the asking price for hitmen,” she reminded him, thankful for the distraction from her rather depressing thoughts.
“You want to talk about it?” Ben asked, sending her another one of those concerned looks that he’d been sending