embarrassed to have forced Noor into being my friend.
“How did your first day back at school go?” I asked, hoping she hadn’t also been bullied. It couldn’t have been easy walking into school with all her longtime friends knowing the truth about her for the very first time.
“It went well, thank you.”
Another formal response. I looked around the café, trying to think of something else I could ask.
“Asmi is having rabbit with six babies. Asmi is wanting give me baby,” said Aamaal.
“Really?” I could have hugged her I was so grateful someone wanted to talk to me. “That’s really wonderful.”
Aamaal gave her sister a triumphant look. “Noor say no.”
I grimaced at Noor. “Sorry, I didn’t know.”
“We have no place to keep it.” She hissed something at Aamaal in their language. Aamaal stuck out her lip. Her eyes filled with tears.
This just kept getting worse. How could I have been so stupid as to think Noor might like me when I couldn’t even connect with kids from my own culture?
Shami said something to Noor in their language. Whatever it was, it didn’t help. She responded, clearly annoyed at him as well.
“What did he say?” I asked, not really expecting she would tell me.
“He also wants a rabbit.”
I wished I hadn’t asked.
“I got called to the principal’s office yesterday,” I blurted, though the hope that I could confide everything was dying fast. “They think they figured out who pretended to be a boy and sent my naked picture all over the school, but they’ve got the wrong girl. Madison, the girl they’ve accused, didn’t do it. It was her best friend texting me. And now the friend is making a play for Madison’s boyfriend.”
Noor cocked her head. I wasn’t sure if she’d understood. Her English was really good but I’d been speaking quickly. I gave her a few minutes to respond. I don’t even know why I continued when she didn’t.
“I overheard the two girls talking when I was checking out my Hater Wall. It’s this wall where everyone who hates me writes about how much they hate me. I think these girls are the ones who started it.”
I paused. I couldn’t believe I’d told her all that. What possible interest could she have in my pathetic little problems?
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I don’t have anyone to talk to.” I blinked back tears and hung my head. It was mortifying.
Suddenly a tiny pair of feet were next to mine. I looked up and was eye level with Shami’s unwavering gaze. He clambered into my lap and rested his head on my chest. I glanced at Noor. She smiled sympathetically, which only made me want to cry more. As usual, I’d messed everything up. I was supposed to be the one helping her, not the other way around. I put my arms around Shami.
“Can I ask you a question?” I asked.
Noor immediately looked wary. “What?”
“Did I do something to upset Parvati?”
“No.” She shook her head. “Why do you ask?”
“I expected her to be with you. Why didn’t she come?”
Noor took a napkin out of the holder in the center of the table and leaned over to wipe Shami’s face. She took away the straw he was blowing through. Spitting on the napkin, she used it to wipe his sticky hands as well. She kept up a running commentary to him the entire time. Even without the translation I knew she was telling him off, but her voice was gentle, and he watched her as though she was the center of his universe. When she finished he slid off me, crawled onto her lap, put his thumb in his mouth and closed his eyes. I could still feel the warmth of him on my empty lap and couldn’t help but feel envious. There wasn’t a person in the world who would choose me first if they had other choices. I wasn’t being self-pitying, it was simply the truth. Even my parents would have chosen my charming, successful brother if they’d had to choose just one of us. Heck, I’d have chosen him over me. I didn’t blame them.
“It’s not you,” she said, returning to our conversation. “Parvati has a problem so she could not come today.”
“Is it something I can help with?”
“It is a big problem. I am telling Parvati to speak to Chanda-Teacher but she will not. She also will not like it if I tell you.”
I tried not to feel hurt. “Is it a secret?”
“Yes, it is her secret. If she wants