least of my worries.
“Can I get you anything? A drink?”
I nodded again. “Water would be good.”
“Sure. Have a seat.” He walked into his kitchen.
I looked around the living area. The leather furniture seemed to reprimand me. See us? See his good life? Don’t ruin it for him.
If only…
Kathleen had talked to me about my options. Abortion. Adoption. I didn’t have to become a mother at eighteen. Or nineteen. Technically I’d be nineteen when the baby came.
I understood all that. But this wasn’t just any baby. It was Brad’s baby. Brad’s and my baby. The man I felt in the depths of my soul was my destiny. The man who would be the father of all my babies.
Brad came back from the kitchen and handed me a glass of water. “Sit down, Daphne.”
Reluctantly, I took a seat on the leather couch that had been mocking me moments ago. He sat down next to me. I took a long drink of the cool water, letting it ease my parched throat.
How could I do this to him?
How?
And what if…
What if he wanted me to have an abortion? Could I do it?
I set the glass of water down on the end table and then turned to him, tears welling in my eyes.
He cupped my cheek. “Oh my God. What is it?”
I melted into him, and his strong arms cocooned around me. If only I could stay here, stay like this, protected within his embrace forever.
I sniffled into his shoulder.
I’d put this off long enough. My therapist wouldn’t have sent me off to college if he didn’t believe I was strong and capable, so I’d be strong and capable.
I’d look the man I loved in the eye and tell him the truth.
I pulled away and sniffled again. I met his gaze. “Brad?”
“Yeah, baby. What is it? What’s wrong?”
“I’m…”
“Yeah?”
“I just came from the health center. I went to get the pill so you wouldn’t have to use condoms.”
He smiled. “That’s sweet of you. So what’s wrong?”
“Turns out, we don’t need condoms anymore, and I don’t need the pill.”
“Oh?”
“I’m pregnant, Brad.”
He cocked his head, as if my words hadn’t quite registered.
“Did you hear me?”
“I don’t understand. I used a rubber.”
“I know. I told them that.”
“So how…?”
“No birth control is a hundred percent effective.”
“One time? After one time?”
I nodded. “I gave the health center your name and told them they could talk to you about it if you called them. I mean, if you want to be sure. I’ll do the test again if you want. I’m not lying.”
“No. No. I mean…no. You don’t have to do the test again.”
“So you don’t think I’m lying?”
“No.” He cleared his throat. “Of course I don’t. I just… I’ve used condoms lots of times, and this never happened.”
“Please,” I said. “I really don’t want to hear about all the other women you’ve fucked right now.”
I shuddered at my use of the word fuck. It wasn’t like me.
“I didn’t mean it like that.”
“That’s what it sounded like. How do you think I feel? I have sex one time, and this happens. Did you use the condom right?”
“For God’s sake, Daphne, I know how to use a damned condom.”
“You might as well have used nothing.”
Then I burst into tears.
I was completely inexperienced. It was my body. I should have taken care of it.
He touched my face. “Honey, please. This isn’t anyone’s fault. Now we have to decide what to do.”
“I know what you want. You want an abortion.”
“Only if that’s what you want.”
“I don’t know what I want, Brad. I’m eighteen years old. I don’t even know what I want to major in yet. I’m not ready to be a mother.”
“I’m not ready to be a father, either. Are you saying you want an abortion?”
“No. No. That’s not what I’m saying. I’ve known about this for an hour. How can I make any kind of decision that quickly?”
“It’s not your decision,” he said. “It’s our decision.”
“Our decision? You can’t be serious. It’s in my body.”
“It’s part of me, too.”
“Stop, just stop!” I stood. “Why is this making us fight? I don’t want that.”
He rose and put his arms around me. “I don’t want that either. I love you, Daphne.”
God, more tears. “I love you too.”
“We’ll work this out one way or another.”
“I don’t think I can do it, Brad.”
“Do what?”
“Have an abortion. It’s not that I’m some pro-life activist or anything. I just don’t like the idea. This is our baby. Yours and mine. A part of you and a part of me.