Fake Friends - Saxon James Page 0,39
Who knew domesticity could be so hot?
I’m glad Mom and Dad weren’t in to witness it though, because they would have lost their shit about him being back there. Insurances and whatever. Plus, you know, after what happened at Leita’s, he’s not exactly their favorite person.
I’m glad he broke and came to see me, because I was one shift away from driving out to his house and apologizing again. I get the feeling he doesn’t like when I do that.
Reynolds slides my drink across the counter, and I thank him before he moves away.
I wasn’t lying when I said I’d think about the offer. The money’s a lot. And a lot would be a huge help toward doing something of my own around here.
I slide my phone out of my pocket and open the account of the influencers Circus showed me the other week. I’m not going to lie, I like looking at them. They’re both really hot and have their own accounts, but while Circus might not know if they’re dating or not, I’m convinced. The way they talk about each other, so openly, is what keeps me coming back to them.
The whole mystery of him is great, but already people are asking when they’re going to see my face and whether I’m actually ugly as fuck, and I get the feeling that as fun as this is, it’s not going to last.
They want to know who I am.
And that’s terrifying.
It doesn’t stop a tiny piece of me from being curious though.
If I were to start my own account, and if I were to start showing my face and letting people in, there has to be a way to block people, right? If I could find out the accounts of people in town, all I’d have to do is make sure they didn’t have access to see my stuff. It’d be a lot of work, but … it’s doable. Surely.
It wouldn’t stop people without an account from finding me, but those people would have to know what they’re looking for first.
And if I did that and set up certain sponsors the way Circus has, when this whole thing ends I might still be able to keep making money that way.
At least short term.
It’s not something I could imagine sustaining my life, because I want a job that’s active. But it could complement it, right?
Holy shit. I’m actually trying to talk myself into this.
I’ve known for a while that I want more than anything to be living life as an openly gay man, but I’ve had no idea how to even make that happen without massive repercussions. Seeing the way Circus’s followers have supported us right from the start though, posting those photos and pretending they’re real, even the accidental phone sex, has me craving that life more than ever. And I’m starting to wonder if there’s a way for me to have it all.
An openly gay man online, maybe a male roommate, and nothing has to change as far as my family is concerned.
Too bad my head is still holding me back.
“Rowan, hey!” Tanner calls out to me from a booth he and Royce have just sat down in. I drain the rest of my beer and order another three before joining them.
“Cheers,” Royce says as I slide his over. We’ve never spoken much, but Tanner’s mom and mine used to run the church bake sales together.
“How’ve you been?” Tanner asks, and Royce snorts out a laugh.
I glance at him. “What?”
“Don’t mind Tanner. He’s just been drooling over your tattoos since you got back.”
Tanner starts to splutter and turns a dark shade of red. “Not … drooling …”
“Apparently he likes bad boys.”
Which is hilarious because Royce is the furthest thing from a bad boy I’ve ever seen. He has shiny brown hair, a baby face, and more freckles than skin. He’s also way skinnier than Tanner which makes them look like a weird pair next to each other.
“I hate to break it to you, Tanner, but I’m basically a saint.”
I slide into the booth with them, and the knot of anxiety in my gut eases up a bit.
Until a familiar, sexy laugh sounds from behind me. “‘Saint?’ Clearly I need to work on my corruption skills.”
I’m down for it, I want to say but can’t. Circus would call me on it anyway.
He slides into the spot next to me and steals a sip of my beer before placing it back in front of me.
I can’t say I hate the