Fake Friends - Saxon James Page 0,12
He smirks. “You’re just going to have to trust me.”
I don’t like the sound of that. Any photos with my face involved could easily be “leaked” and wind up in my family’s hands. “Umm … you get why I don’t want my face seen, right?”
He scoffs. “You gave me a broken nose, not amnesia. Of course I know, just like you should know I’m not a piece of shit who’ll out you.”
“I’m just saying—”
He sits up suddenly, eyes flashing. “Stop just saying. We’re not here to chat. We’re not catching up. We’re doing a job. Now can you shut up and just do it?”
“No.”
“No?”
I sit up and mirror him, waiting for him to meet my eyes. When he finally does, I remember how dangerous his stare can be. “I’m sorry.”
Surprise flashes across his face.
“I know that doesn’t make up for anything, but I am. What I did was wrong, and I’ve spent the last five years regretting it.”
I can tell his guard is starting to slip, so I keep talking.
“I’m not saying we have to be friends, but can we at least try to drop this tension? If you want this to be natural, you’re going to have to meet me halfway.”
He’s not sold. I get it. I’ve spent the last five years beating myself up over the dumbest thing I’ve ever done, so nothing Circus can say will top what I’ve already told myself.
I know exactly what he’s thinking.
“Look, I’m an asshole. Can we just spend today acting like I’m not?”
“Fine.” His long, full lips curl up at the sides. “Move over.”
“What do you …”
Oh, oh. Okay.
He shoves me across to the other side of my lounger and slides in beside me.
My brain short-circuits. His warm body presses against mine as he steers me facedown again. And there’s, like, nothing between us.
My mouth is dry as he runs a hand down my back, and I have to remind myself this is all part of the photos.
“So, need me to do anything, or …”
“Just lie there and be my prop.” His normally gravelly voice is even scratchier than usual.
But like hell am I going to argue, because for some reason being his prop sounds really fucking hot.
I have no idea what exactly he’s doing, but every time his leg slides over mine, or his chest touches my back, I have to hold in a groan.
I’m barely keeping it together when he nips my earlobe and gives my ass a solid squeeze.
“Shit.” I jolt under his touch, but pulling back so I can see his face doesn’t help solve my problem.
He’s watching me steadily, clearly challenging me to leave.
Yeah, I’m not gonna do that.
With all my usual warning sensors in overdrive, I loop an arm around his waist and drag him closer. “You wanted sexy.”
I pull Circus’s leg over my hip and bury my face in his neck. Because how else am I supposed to hide my face?
And dear God. He feels incredible. All warm tight muscles and sharp jawline. I can’t ever remember letting myself get this close to a man, and it’s probably a good thing, because I can already tell how easy it would be to become addicted. To let go.
And I’ve been so good.
In my whole life I’ve only slipped a handful of times, but damn Circus makes me want to slip. To take everything that could have been mine and more.
Somehow, I behave.
Even when we get changed into proper swimsuits and he lays me back down, I manage to keep my hands to myself.
There’s very little talking, and I can’t tell if that’s making the situation better or worse.
Circus slides across my body, resting his head on my chest, and I glance down under the hat resting over my face and watch his eyes fall closed.
He looks so peaceful.
So gorgeous.
I run my hand over his back, and suddenly, I really need this to end.
“Okay, that’s enough pictures of us dry humping.”
He slowly sits back up as I toss the hat aside. “Why? You’re clearly enjoying it.” Then he very obviously glances at the erection straining against my swimsuit.
I know what he’s trying to do. He’s trying to make me uncomfortable. And I am. More than I should be. Because as much as I want to embrace who I am, that voice in my head, telling me I’m wrong, is getting loud.
Even though it’s making me feel sick, I ignore it and tuck my hands behind my head instead. “I thought we worked out years ago that