standing in the garden as the queen’s man pulled the door between them closed.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
FAITHLESS
The first thing that registered for Fie was the pounding of her own heart, a war drum in her ears.
The second were the crows, crying from the rooftop above.
Tavin knew. He’d—known.
How long had he—
Her veins were fire, her bones were ash, and he was gone, gone—
She stumbled over to a bench tucked in the garden’s corner, crashed down on it, tried to think, tried to breathe. He’d known. He’d known. But—answers, she needed answers, she needed to scream, she needed to burn this tower down and pull him from the embers.
Crow-song rattled above.
Fie’s hands were shaking almost too bad to pry Tavin’s tooth from the bit of rag she’d kept it in, but then she had it clutched in a shaking hand, her other scrambling for an Owl tooth. The spark of a long-dead clerk plodded out in her mind, a grandmother cracking her knuckles as Fie woke Tavin’s tooth next.
She saw flashes of memory, tried to shut them out; the Owl clerk politely stepped in and whisked them away.
I need—I need—
Fie tried to muster her thoughts into some semblance of a request but couldn’t pare it down. I need help.
The Owl clerk went to work. After a moment, she said: It seems the question you have is: How? From what I can tell, these are your answers.
Fie blinked, and the garden was gone.
* * *
He was nine, and someone was speaking to him: “If you truly love something, you’ll do whatever is best for it. You’ll give everything you have for it. You understand that, right? Love means sacrifice. It’s why your job is so important.”
Tavin nodded, though the idea scared him.
“You love your brother. And you love your country. You should be ready to protect them, no matter the cost. Can I trust you to do that?”
“Yes, Your Majesty,” he mumbled.
The king smiled down at him. “Good.”
* * *
He knelt by the side of the road, by a dead body in the green grass, an empty leather bag at its side.
He could have stopped this. He could have saved her if he’d pushed harder, if he hadn’t waited for his mother’s permission—he could have saved her—
Fie was dead because he’d failed. He hadn’t given enough.
* * *
“You’re hardly a fool.” The Black Swan spy regarded him with a piercing stare. “You know the queen has to be preparing a strike, right?”
Tavin knew better than to answer right away. It had been clear Khoda was nowhere near close to being completely honest with them earlier, in his mother’s tent. If there were truths he’d squirmed out of stating in front of a small crowd, Tavin had come to pry them out.
But this was a test. Would he accept anything Khoda said because he was an all-knowing spy, or would he reject it because Khoda was clearly untrustworthy?
The way to play these games was neither. He’d survived the palace long enough to know. “She already struck at Fie, who wasn’t a threat. It doesn’t make sense to just ignore the small army marching behind Jas. But we’re all aware.”
Khoda nodded, tight-lipped but approving. “Rhusana doesn’t do things by halves, so when she hits, we’ll know. But that’s all I have for you, I swear. Like I said, we can’t get anyone embedded close enough to her.” His gaze narrowed. “You’re not a fool. So I want you to think about this: an army isn’t the only way Rhusana can be defeated. If she makes her move, and it doesn’t look like there’s a way out … We need someone on the inside.”
“I’m not a spy. Besides, Fie and Jas would never let me take that kind of risk.”
“They don’t have to know,” Khoda said.
“No.” Tavin felt the ugly fire in him bristle and hiss at that. “I won’t do that to either of them.”
“Then do it for both of them.” Khoda looked genuinely unhappy. “This is all still purely hypothetical. But we both know what Fie’s capable of. What she and the prince can do together. And we know what lengths they’ll go to save what they love.” He grimaced. “So if it looks like Rhusana’s going to win, if it looks like there’s no way out … Think about it. You could be what we need to take her down from the inside.”
Tavin didn’t answer. He didn’t want to think about it; he wanted Jas on the throne, and Rhusana in prison, and to stay