we had talked about Twilight and vampires. Never in one million years did I ever think anything like a vampire really existed, it was just insane.
I couldn’t lie to Will or myself. I was really scared now; all this was just too much. I wasn’t sure how to handle it. I forced a smile. I could see he was scared. I could see he was waiting for me to run away, but I was too scared to move and afraid to even take a deep breath. I swallowed hard as I stroked his cheek, trying to slow my breathing. I could feel my heart racing in my chest as he looked away from me.
“Are you okay?” His voice was shaking as he placed his hand over mine still on his cheek.
“I’m okay.” I fumbled for words. I knew I needed space and time to think about this all, but I couldn’t bear to hurt him by running away. “Do you want me to take you home?” He looked at me tenderly. “Do you want me to leave?”
“William, I just….” I choked up again. “I’m worried. Are you okay? I mean maybe this whole vampire thing is in your head.” I patted his cheek nervously. “I’ve heard of syndromes where people believe they are things they couldn’t possibly be, it could be all in your head. I’m sure we could find you a counselor to talk to about all this stuff, or maybe even my own therapist at the teen center. She is really great….” He put his finger across my lips gently silencing me mid-sentence.
“Corrine, stop this please.” He dropped his hands sitting back on his heels, still kneeling in front of me in the icy snow. He still held one of my hands tightly. “I was born in 1894, okay… and I’m pretty sure it would be impossible for me to be here sitting at your feet if I was still 100% human.” I gasped at his announcement. I was in total shock now worse shock than before. I started shaking, and I put my hands in my pocket to hide the trembling.
“You… you were born in 1894? Oh my God William!” I took a shuddering deep breath. “But…what…I mean my God Will. How…I did this happen? I just do not understand it all. You are freaking my out!”
“I died in 1912. I mean my human life ended that year. I was barely eighteen years old at the time.”
I didn’t realize I had backed away. A flash of hurt flooded his eyes as I realized what I had done suddenly. My movements to him meant rejection. A cold gust of wind hit me hard, as I stared at the pain filled look on his face.
“I don’t mean to back away Will. It’s just so hard to get a handle on this. It’s blowing my mind.” I tried desperately to relax. I knew he wasn’t going to hurt me, or at least I hoped he wouldn’t.
“I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I guess I just…” He sighed, shaking his head. “I wanted to forget the truth, to pretend I was normal, that we had a regular relationship. I spend the majority of my time trying to hide what I am, trying to be normal. It’s a constant battle. I am a danger to you, a real and true danger. I couldn’t let us get any closer until you knew the whole story. I could never hurt you that way; you can go now if you want. I can see it in your eyes. I terrify you.” He looked down at the snow, defeated. “I won’t try to stop you, in fact, you’d probably be better off to go now, before we get any more attached to each other.” I was heartbroken by the tears in his eyes; he was allowing me to go even though it was killing him to do so.
“No, Will. I’m not leaving you. I can deal with this…somehow.”
“Don’t you see Corrine? It’s too dangerous. When we kiss, we touch. I smell your skin and the blood in your veins, it calls me in. It’s not good.” He looks into my eyes now. “I could lose my self- control. I could do something very bad, and not be able to stop.” I knew what he meant. I had seen movies that were crude and horrific about how vampires needed blood to survive. I was a human happy meal sitting here in front of him right