do; even when he is in the shower for ten minutes I feel the ache in my chest from missing him, so I have no idea how on earth I'm going to survive weeks, no months, away from him. And will the few short days we do finally have together be enough? It would be different if it wasn't Mexico, it's such a long and expensive flight, even if we could find the time, there's no guarantee we will find the money as well. I suppose it won't be so hard for Carlos, but I can't predict how things will go for me. Right now I'm financially stable, but if I have a few slow months at work, potentially it could all come crashing down.
I have to chastise myself, there is no point worrying about things you have no control over, I have a minimum of four months to save before I am even allowed to take more holiday from work, plus I can make sure I have money left after decorating the house and it's not like I will have to pay for the hotel next time, I wouldn't have thought. All in all I can safely say that money wise I will be fine for at least the next two possible trips back.
My mind is whirring with possibilities, the hows and whens hastily popping up and wedging themselves into my brain. I think we might just be able to do this, emotionally I'm sure it will almost kill me, but if I can survive that side of things, the rest is just down to organisation.
“OK, lets do it” I agree.
We spend the day locked away together, cherishing the precious few moments we will get together. No one comes round, I'm relieved that his siblings don't launch yet another attack today, it's exhausting dealing with them; plus their relentless abuse towards me would put a real dampener on our cozy time together.
It's a beautiful day in all ways. The sun is shining, and we spend all day talking of our hopes and dreams and our love for each other. I don't remember a time when I was more content than I am right now.
My Adonis has done so much for me, cured my broken heart, filled me with confidence, saved me from my ex-husband, his family and most of all, from myself.
After years with Jake I had become safe and boring and sensible, never taking a risk for fear of retribution. I was so unhappy in my own skin and I didn't even know it, until Carlos came along and released me from all that was binding me to my insecurities.
I have so much more to thank him for than he will ever know.
I can't believe that in three short weeks my life has done a complete turn around, I am returning home a changed woman, with the love of my life in tow.
It's early afternoon when I realise it's been three days since I last spoke to Caz and she must be going mad with curiosity about what happened to make me change my flight the message I left covered the bare essentials, but I didn't go into much detail, and then there's everything else that's happened since that I want to tell her about. I don't want to cut into my time with Carlos though, so I fire off an email to her instead of calling. While I fire up my trusty laptop, Carlos pops out to get a few provisions in as we are running low on food, which is ideal as it means I can go into more detail than I would have if he was sat watching over my shoulder.
My inbox is full to the brim, but nothing is marked as urgent so I decide it can all wait till I get back, instead I get straight down to business emailing Caz.
To: Cassie Black
From: Kaitlin Mavers
Subject: Quick update
Hi Caz,
I realised I left you a bit high and dry with that message the other day. In case you didn't guess, Carlos came and got me at the airport, we've made up and told his family where to go. We have had a few run ins with them since, but I will fill you in on all the details when I get back. I'm so sad about leaving, but I'm also excited about seeing you again and giving you all the gossip!
Things are going amazingly with Carlos, you probably won't be too happy to hear that