Empire High Betrayal (Empire High #3) - Ivy Smoak Page 0,117
their hand on my shoulder.
I looked up to see Mason sitting down beside me. He didn’t offer any words. Because what could he say?
James and Rob joined us a second later.
“Matt?” James said. He stepped in front of me. He wiped the tears off his cheeks and shook his head. “I gotta tell you. Brooklyn didn’t know how far the prank was going to go. I didn’t even know.”
“It was my fault,” Rob said. He wiped a tissue under his nose. “I just thought it would be funny. I wasn’t trying to mess with your relationship, Matt. I swear.”
I nodded. Rob always took jokes too far. He didn’t have to explain that to me, I’d seen plenty of his pranks firsthand.
“And she really was just trying to get us all to be friends again,” James said. “We made a deal. That if she helped us with the prank, we’d try to sort things out with you guys.”
I knew that too. I’d listened to all the missed voicemails. And read all the texts that I’d originally ignored. Brooklyn had explained everything.
I thought about the last voicemail she left me. She’d been crying. And she called me a hypocrite. Her last words to me. You’re a fucking hypocrite.
And mine to her? I’d told her I didn’t believe in her. And called her a liar. And walked out instead of having a conversation with her. I’d left her feeling alone, when being alone was her greatest fear. Having no one that loved her. And time. Time and not having enough of it. It felt like there was a knife in my chest twisting every time I thought about her. Did she die thinking I didn’t love her? Was that the last thing she remembered of me?
“It’s okay,” I said. It wasn’t. I forgave James and Rob for the prank. I did. But what they’d roped Brooklyn into doing had set me off. That prank caused me to say those terrible things to Brooklyn. My last fucking words to her.
So I hated James.
I hated Rob.
But I hated myself the most.
Rob sat down next to me. “I feel awful. I should have told her about the rest of the prank. She was so mad at me. I never meant to upset her. I thought…I don’t know what I thought. Well, I thought she’d think it was funny. But she wasn’t laughing. And I hate that she was mad at me at the end.”
James nodded. “That look on her face after you left, Matt. She was so mad at us. I felt awful. I never meant to hurt her. I really liked her. She was perfect. For you. She was perfect for you. And I’m really sorry that I interfered at all. I never should have flirted with your girl. I’m just…I’m really fucking sorry, Matt.”
I looked down at my shoes. I couldn’t even look at him. I’d been waiting for him to apologize to me. But the wound felt too fresh. He’d flirted with her brazenly right in front of me. Like it was all a game. Nothing felt like a game anymore. “It’s okay,” I finally said. It wasn’t. But I didn’t have the energy to hold a grudge right now. I just needed my friend back.
“I told her not to follow you after the prank,” Mason said. “I was so cold to her.” He grabbed a tissue out of his pocket. “I feel like a dick.”
“You guys have nothing to feel guilty about,” I said. I was the one that was guilty. Not them. She’d relied on me. I was the one that let her down.
“Do you want to talk about it?” James asked.
I shook my head.
“Maybe another time? You guys could come over later. Like old times.” He smiled, but I could tell it was forced. There was no going back to old times now that Brooklyn was gone. And we all knew it.
“I can’t talk about it.” I couldn’t voice what I’d done. My horrible last words to her. Saying it out loud would make it feel more real. I hated that she thought I hated her. I hated that I’d let her down.
They all waited like they thought I’d change my mind.
“I can’t, you guys.”
“Okay,” Rob said. “Then we won’t talk about it.” He put his hand out. “Let’s all promise to never talk about her again. Not until Matt’s ready to.”
“Yeah.” James put his hand on top of Rob’s. “We all fucked up.”